Perfectionism Rewired

Type A Personality

About

Perfectionists are the fastest growing population in the world, which is why Perfectionism Rewired exists, so being a perfectionist can go from a liability to your biggest asset.

This podcast is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens and offers the latest neuroplasticity + interoception techniques for the practical-perfectionist who wants that extra edge over obsolete advice to "overcome your perfectionism"

Listen for fierce insights on exiting victim mentality, what self-sabotage *really is*, how to stop people pleasing without compromising kindness, catastrophizing, ruminating, overthinking and upgrading all-or-nothing mindset, so you can quit fighting against your perfectionistic tendencies and feel as put together as your life looks.

Perfectionism Rewired podcast provides answers to questions like:

- How do I stop being such a control freak?
- What are the types of perfectionism?
- Is there a perfectionism test?
- What’s the root cause of perfectionism?
- How to overcome perfectionism?
- Is perfectionism ADHD?
- What causes perfectionism anxiety?
- Am i a perfectionist?
-What is interoception?

Being a perfectionist is very powerful. But only if you know how to leverage it. For more on optimizing your perfectionism go to courtneylovegavin.com

Available on

Community

227 episodes

6 Self-Sabotaging Patterns Perfectionists Unknowingly Nurture

For driven perfectionists self-sabotage often appears as status quo success and our unfulfilling choices are applauded. Bc these self-sabotaging perfectionistic patterns go undetected, you’re off chasing an illusion of control, achieving under pressure with an overcrowded schedule, snipping at your spouse,  thinking I'll be happy when..."  only to find the goalposts keep moving. Discover precisely how to recognize your own self-defeating perfectionism patterns, exactly what's driving your self-sabotaging behaviors and the perfectionist's guide to stop self-sabotage..  If you're committed to intentionally moving beyond autopilot and   Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized  high-integrity private coaching is for you! Sumptuous, science-backed solutions designed specifically for tenacious Type-A perfectionists. Get your stress free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   TRUTH + ACCURACY IN THIS EPISODE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: __ __

10m
Mar 29
Self Critic Screams: What Your Body Is Dying To Tell You

What if your self critic is actually a caring signal from your unconscious, warning you of danger ahead + to get off this path? Your self critic is not the enemy; it's an alarm bell from your body. But it's near impossible to listen to it with all the NOISE + stigma surrounding criticism, self-love and self-compassion. Discover the health consequences of self-criticism and lessons from pro-athlete perfectionist who finally figured it out. This is the third episode in the self-criticism trilogy.  I'm inviting you into the one place that can make your self critic a thing of the past— all you gotta do is take the first step.  Go for it today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   EP. 214 TIMESTAMPS 02:04-The Iceberg of Self-Criticism 03:27-Why Traditional Self Critic Approaches Fail Perfectionists 04:37-Lessons From Pro-Athlete Perfectionism Optimized Client 07:07-Link Between Cancer + Inner Critic 08:02-From Criticism to Critical Condition IRL 09:11-Making the Choice to Change    TRUTH + ACCURACY IN THIS EPISODE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: __ __

12m
Mar 25
"Why Am I So Hard On Myself"

Uncover the shocking truth behind your self critic and how to *finally* break free. Plus the massive opportunity-costs you are blind to every time you self criticize, how habitual self-criticism creates insidious patterns of self-sabotage and 3 simple steps to be high-quality in all areas of your life WITHOUT self-criticism. Ready to liberate yourself from perfectionism prison? If you want to know how to work WITH YOUR brilliant perfectionistic brain, feel as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside and live unapologetically true to who you be + what you value Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 1-1 coaching is for you! Here's where you start  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized

20m
Mar 18
Self-Criticism Won’t Quit? Confidently Shut.It.Down

Is your Self-Criticism only getting worse? Overthinking a million ways you suck your mind's go-to? If your self-criticism cycles JUST won't quit, it's not bc you need more self-compassion, self-love or a less tragic childhood. It's simply bc you're focusing on the wrong problem and by misidentifying your problem, you're missing out on all the super simple solutions. That silliness ends NOW. Discover the 8 undercover forces driving your self-criticism cycles AND exactly how to solve each one. If you're DONE with self-criticism holding you back + want to remember what playfully proud of yourself feels like and gain lifetime skills that make you stronger, happier, braver, calmer + more resilient  Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 1-1 coaching is for you! Sumptuous, science-backed solutions designed specifically for YOUR perfectionistic tendencies. Get your stress-free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   EP. 212 TIMESTAMPS 00:00-Identifying WHY You Self-Criticize 02:46-The ROOT of Self-Critical Pattern No. 1 05:10-How ADHD Feeds Off Self-Criticism 07:20-Why Am I So Hard On Myself? SOLVED 09:55-When Your Career Demands Your Self Critic 11:45-Solutions That Actually Work for Overly Critical Achievers 13:25-Criticizing Yourself to Create Change 16:45-Hyper Critical Power Dynamics 18:33-How To Stop Beating Yourself Up   TRUTH + ACCURACY IN THIS EPISODE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: __ __  

19m
Mar 15
The Surprising Relief of RAISING Your Standards

How raising your standards solves the perfectionistic tendencies that've been holding you back. Hear from Perfectionism Optimized client Brian who was exhausted from being everything to everyone while pulled in a million directions and how making this ONE swap immediately created a cascade of less stress, more presence and legit enjoyment in his dynamic life. Whether it's spending quality time with your family, stop dreading the guilt you’ll feel on vacation or dealing with the pressures of being excellent at everything, this episode gives you a step-by-step guide on the inner workings of perfectionist brains and how to easily structure your days around what's most meaningful to YOU. Why lower your standards when raising them upgrades your entire life? If you're committed to being stronger, happier, braver + more resilient and want the only tools designed specifically for driven overachievers to feel as amazing as their life looks Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 1-1 coaching is for you! Get your stress-free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE TO LEARN: __ __   EP. 211 TIMESTAMPS 00:00-Raising standards for perfectionists = upgrades relationships + focus 02:29-Brian's Story: Client Case Study on Changing Life Dynamics 04:16-The True Meaning of Raising Your Standards 06:15-What Raising Your Standards as a Perfectionist Is Like IRL 09:00-The EPIC Framework™ Empowered Presence and Interoceptive Connection 11:09-Action Steps to Identify + Attune Your Own Standards 13:45-Trying to Control vs Being in Charge 15:17-Constantly battling your own unrealistic expectations?

16m
Mar 13
Never Good Enough...Ends Now

Exactly how you can end the never good enough cycle right now, for real + for-ever. Plus WHY what you've tried before didn't work +  why this will work FOR you. PERIOD.  Why settle for good enough when you could be empowered? If you want the only tools designed specifically for perfectionists to move beyond never enough,  skills that make you stronger, happier, braver, more resilient and want in-depth personalized support rewiring your perfectionistic tendencies, Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 1-1 coaching is for you! Get your stress-free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   EP. 210 TIMESTAMPS 00:00-Never Good Enough No Matter How Hard You Try 01:19-Am I Good Enough 03:30-Moving Beyond Inadequacy Fallacy 05:12-When is enough is enough 06:07-No Wonder You Feel Not Good Enough 07:11-The Game Is Rigged So You Feel Inadequate 08:20-How Affirmations Erode Self-Trust 09:52-Playing a Better Game: Empowered Perfectionism 10:55-How to Be Present + Relaxed in a Purpose Driven Life   TRUTH + ACCURACY IN THIS EPISODE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: __ __    

12m
Mar 12
Catastrophize. Ruminate. Overthink. People Pleaser: Upgrading Your Tools

The MOST productive + positive way to quit people-pleasing, ruminating, catastrophizing, overthinking, second guessing yourself, constantly seeking reassurance, answering work emails on vacation, over-apologizing. The real reason WHY you haven’t been able to stop despite knowing harmful side effects. Awesome acronym to identity your own perfectionistic landmines + step-by-step how to get relief that elevates you instead of keeps you stuck spinning out.  You don't have to white knuckle your perfectionism. And if you feel like you are, I invite you to come coach with me 1-on-1 inside Perfectionism Optimized /courtneylovegavin.com/optimized, where you'll learn how to take charge of your perfectionistic tendencies, which means you'll finally feel as awesome as your life looks and stop trying to control everyone in your orbit. Get your stress-free start today at courtneylovegavin.com/optimized

25m
Mar 05
If I'm Not Judgmental..how do I know i'm right?

Fear of failure holding you back? Can't stop obsessing over what you should've done better? I'm telling you exactly how to stop being judgmental, drop the fear of failure and always know if you're doing a good job with a way that's more useful, feels better + helps you progress wayyyy faster  Listen to liberate yo self from the cycle of fear and self-consciousness.  If you’re committed to being stronger, happier, braver, more resilient and want in-depth personalized support rewiring your perfectionism, Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 1-1 coaching is for you! Get your stress-free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Listen to the full episode to learn: __ __ EP. 208 TIMESTAMPS 00:00-How Judgment Holds Perfectionists Back 02:20-Fear of Failure + Its Dangerous Consequences 03:51-Why Am I So Hard On Myself 05:26-Being Judgmental is a Protection Mechanism 06:33-What Lies Beneath Your Judgment 07:30-From Judging Yourself to Joyful Winning 09:27-Exactly how to drop judgmental 12:22-Trading Contempt for Curiosity + Experimentation 14:42-How To 13x Building Your Resilience 15:53-Rewiring Your Perfectionistic Patterns From The Inside Out   TRUTH + ACCURACY IN THIS EPISODE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: __ __  

16m
Feb 22
Perfectionism in Relationships: Resentment

Uncover how perfectionism impacts your intimate relationships and the No. 1 mistake you're probably making when it comes to resentment, Plus the ONE SKILL that makes you 90% less overwhelmed? It's like having the power to predict and avoid emotional meltdowns – for yourself!    Ready to rewire? Upgrade resentment for resilience inside Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized, the only 1-1 private coaching exclusively made for for driven perfectionists + type-A high achievers with perfectionistic tendencies who want to quit fighting against themselves forever. Melt your stress away starting today over at:  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   REFERENCED IN THE EPISODE: __ __  

18m
Feb 21
How To Rise From Setbacks *without* Beating Yourself Up

Are you a high achiever who secretly struggles when things don't go according to plan? A setback occurs and it feels like your world is falling apart? SAME. In this episode, I'm candidly sharing my recent stumbles and how I moved forward without blame, making myself small or beating my self to a pulp. You'll learn what NOT to do when things go awry, how to melt away the ruminating and catasrophizing and what to do with all those feelings inside (it's not AT ALL what you think). If you're ready to experience the amazingness that comes with being an empowered perfectionist  and want proven, science-backed tools to PLAYFULLY INTERRUPT the perfectionistic habits currently cramping your prolificness, you belong inside the Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator. https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator   Listen to the Full Episode To Learn: __ __   REFERENCED IN THE EPISODE: __ __   EP. 206 TIMESTAMPS 00:00-When Everything Goes Wrong Despite Your Best Efforts 02:02-Understanding Why Your Inner Critic Calls 03:20-Accepting Life As A Human = Embracing Adaptability Over Rigid Planning 04:39-Ruminating + Futility of Dwelling on Your Past 05:32-Power of Living in the Present 06:47-The Doritos Analogy: Choosing Better Responses 07:39-Debunking the Cause-and-Effect Fallacy 08:29-Taking Responsibility for Your Choices 09:11-How to Handle Emotions Constructively 10:06-Staying Present to Rise Above Challenges 11:17-Overcoming the Self-Criticism Trap 12:56-Embracing Mistakes and Perfectionist Humanity

15m
Feb 14
Got FOMO? Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator Closing Forever FRIDAY Feb. 16

Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator 1.0 Closing Friday Feb. 16. Join the Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Before Its Gone Forever! + Overcome the "Not Ready Yet" Mindset with this HOT tip. If you've been wanting to rewire your perfectionist patterns, now's YOUR time to take action. Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator 1.0 is closing + retiring forever-ever this Friday, February 16, 2024.  To get in before it's literally too late, go to courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator today. 

2m
Feb 13
Uncovering Your Source of Overthinking + Ruminating

Break free rom the swampy stress of rumination + overthinking TODAY with this simple method that allows you to slow mental chatter's roll in a way that talking can’t. Listen as I walk you step-by-step how you can get an accurate read of what's happening inside your head + clear up your perspective so that you can finally feel calm-ish. If you want to make sure overthinking + rumination NEVER CONTROLS YOU AGAIN and want proven, science-backed tools to PLAYFULLY INTERRUPT the perfectionistic habits currently holding you hostage, you gotta check out the Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator fast-track. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Listen to the Full Episode To Hear: __ __ PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Courtney Love Gavin x  Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth + accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionist affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

5m
Feb 01
Why Asking for Help is Harder for Perfectionists

You're used to being the go-to person, who's always happy to help and yet..why is it so freaking hard for you to ask for support? Discover how perfectionism isn't an excuse, it's an explanation and how to advocate for yourself on this empowering episode. If you want to have the capacity, courage & certainty to seek support and leverage it, you gotta check out my 1-1 coaching for high-achievers with perfectionistic tendencies Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator. https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Listen to the Full Episode To Hear: __ __ RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: __ __   EP.204 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Perfectionism as Self-Advocacy 01:22-The Awkwardness of Seeking Support 02:08-Learning to Meet Yourself Where You're At 04:33-Identifying Areas You'd Secretly Love Some Support 06:17-Finding Your Path to Rewire Your Perfectionism   PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Courtney Love Gavin x  Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth + accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionist affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

7m
Jan 30
Overcome Your Perfectionism the Feel Good Way!

Are you tired of white-knuckling it? Ready to move beyond relentless people-pleasing and pretending to be calm? Discover the you're not overcoming perfectionism (it has nothing to do with how hard you’re trying) and how to stop settling for a life of miserable meh as a recovering perfectionist. Perfectionism Leveraged client Whitney courageously shares her story of being tightly wound mom of 3 young girls, addicted to control, teetering on burnout in a prison yard of her own making and magnificently frustrated. Hear how she found the willingness to experiment, let go of control and rewired to become a powerhouse, present parent who's daughters are SO proud of their mom. If you want to make sure crippling perfectionism NEVER CONTROLS YOU AGAIN and want proven, science-backed tools to PLAYFULLY INTERRUPT the perfectionistic habits currently holding you hostage, you gotta check out the Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator fast-track. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Listen to the Full Episode To Hear: __ __ RESOURCES MENTIONED: __ __   EPISODE 203 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-From Enduring to Enjoying Your Perfectionistic Tendencies 01:48-Overcome Perfectionism Feel Good Way 02:53-The Never-Ending Need for Play 03:18-Neuroscience and Play in Adulthood 04:35-Reconnecting With Your Playful Self 05:41-Steps to Create Your Perfectionism Playground 06:03-Case Study: Whitney's Journey with Perfectionism 07:38-Impact of Perfectionist Parenting on Children 09:15-What Cooking + Rewiring Perfectionism Have in Common 10:58-Seeking Help to Uncover YOUR Perfectionist Playground 11:48-Benefits of the Perfectionism Rewired Accelerator   SCIENCEY CREDIBLE CITATIONS REFERENCED IN THIS EXCITING EPISODE: __ __ GOT VALUE FROM THIS EPISODE? Help CLG create more --> https://www.buymeacoffee.com/perfectionist   PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Courtney Love Gavin x  Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth + accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionist affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

12m
Jan 29
Lighten Your Load: Caring Deeply without Taking on Too Much

You know logically it’s not *your job* to fix everything in your orbit yet the moment anything goes awry, you feel like the outcome is all on your shoulders. Perhaps you say “yes” to practically everything you’re asked to do…but feel kinda resentful later. An overactive sense of responsibility can be a tough habit to unlearn when you CARE deeply + are teetering on the edge of burnout. Learn how to easily distinguish between care-ing and carrying aka overloading yourself. Plus practical tips you can use immediately for ending codependency with kindness and being empathetic + present without getting bogged down by other people's emotions.  If you’re committed to being stronger, happier, braver, more resilient and want in-depth personalized support rewiring your perfectionism, The Accelerator https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator 1-1 coaching is for you!  Get started today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator   LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE TO HEAR: __ __   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE: __ __ PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Courtney Love Gavin x  Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth + accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionist affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

17m
Jan 16
Why Knowing More = Paralyzing You From Growing More

How to know when searching for the perfect way to fix yourself is secretly holding you back and the 5 hidden dangers all driven high-performers want to be aware of. Discover why compulsively seeking more information to solve perfectionistic problems is actually self-sabotage and how you can upgrade obsessively finding the right answers to playfully pursuing the correct ones FOR YOU.   Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you decide to rewire your perfectionistic tendencies https://courtneylovegavin.com/services through private 1-1 coaching, you gain the EPIC SKILLS that LIBERATE you from intrusive thoughts, self-sabotage and put you back in charge. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/services   SNEAKY PEEK AT WHAT YOU'LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: __ __   FEATURED ON EPISODE 201: __ __   PERFECTIONISM REWIRED  EP. 201 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Letting Go of Obsession with Finding the Right Answers 01:38-Iceberg Analogy of Perfectionism 02:10-Limitations of a Checklist Approach To Fixing Yourself 03:03-The Pitfalls of Overvaluing Knowledge 04:06-Procrastination + Self-Sabotage in Disguise 05:01-Integrating + Implementing Wisdom 06:10-The 3X Approach to Consuming Information 07:25-Mindful Consumption of Knowledge 09:18-Redefining Your Core Identity 10:15-Overcoming Self-Sabotage   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE: Arnold, M., Mascha Goldschmitt, & Rigotti, T. (2023). Dealing with information overload: a comprehensive review. , . https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1122200 ‌ Middlebrooks, C. D. (2017). Selectively Distracted: Divided Attention and Memory for Important Information - Catherine D. Middlebrooks, Tyson Kerr, Alan D. Castel, 2017. Retrieved January 14, 2024, from Psychological Science website: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0956797617702502 ‌ Solms, L., Koen, J., A.E.M. van Vianen, Theeboom, T., Beersma, B., Anne, & Matthijs de Hoog. (2022). Simply effective? The differential effects of solution-focused and problem-focused coaching questions in a self-coaching writing exercise. , . https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.895439     PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neuorinclusivity movement that sees all humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

11m
Jan 14
Feeling Inadequate? When it feels like you're falling short (+ how to change it today)

It’s our 200th episode and I’m sharing what *really* happens when you upgrade from control to power, the suck of growth as a perfectionist and ultimately finding empowerment in what initially seemed like total ruin. Join me in choosing to rise to the occasion of being a perfectionist as I  unravel the messy striving, intrusive thoughts, why we hold so tightly to things that matter the least and how to let go. HERE'S A SNEAK PEEK AT WHAT YOU'LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: __ __ Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you join Perfectionism Leveraged https://courtneylovegavin.com/contact you get customized 1-1 coaching + the EPIC SKILLS that LIBERATE you from intrusive thoughts, self-sabotage and put you back in command. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/contact   FEATURED ON EPISODE 200: __ __   PERFECTIONISM REWIRED  EP. 200 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Striving becomes Self-sabotage 04:15-Once Upon A Perfectionist named CLG 6:06-Black and white thinking 10:38-How to stop overthinking 12:22-Embodied Presence Interoception Connection (E.P.I.C. Framework™) 13:20-Shifting from Shame Avoidance to Satisfying Success 14:42-Practice Makes Permanent 15:51-Intrusive Thoughts 17:27-When you are enjoying your perfectionism instead of enduring 20:43-Fixed Mindset 25:00-How To Feel Good NOW   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE: Boon Chong Ng. (2018). The Neuroscience of Growth Mindset and Intrinsic Motivation. , (2), 20–20. https://doi.org/10.3390/brainsci8020020 Dorevitch, B., Buck, K., Fuller‐Tyszkiewicz, M., Phillips, L., & Krug, I. (2020). Maladaptive Perfectionism and Depression: Testing the Mediating Role of Self-Esteem and Internalized Shame in an Australian Domestic and Asian International University Sample. , . https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.01272 ‌ Dweck, C. S., Walton, G. M., & Cohen, G. L. (2014). . Retrieved from https://ed.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/manual/dweck-walton-cohen-2014.pdf ‌ Jung, C. G. (1957). The transcendent function. Montano, L. T. (2023). The Relationship of Perfectionism and Peace of Mind: The Mediating Role of Implicit Theories of Intelligence. , (3), 447–462. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12646-023-00739-1 ‌ Moser, J. S., Dougherty, A., Mattson, W. I., Katz, B., Moran, T. P., Guevarra, D. A., … Kross, E. (2017). Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI. , (1). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-017-04047-3 ‌ Stiles, W. B., Glick, M. J., Osatuke, K., Hardy, G. E., Shapiro, D. A., Agnew-Davies, R., Rees, A., & Barkham, M. (2004). Patterns of Alliance Development and the Rupture-Repair Hypothesis: Are Productive Relationships U-Shaped or V-Shaped? (1), 81–92. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-0167.51.1.81 https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1037/0022-0167.51.1.81 Stoeber, J., Madigan, D. J., & Lazaros Gonidis. (2020). Perfectionism is adaptive and maladaptive, but what’s the combined effect? , , 109846–109846. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2020.109846 PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neuorinclusivity movement that sees all humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

26m
Jan 07
BACK ONLINE: When Perfectionists Broke The Internet

Big News: Website Is Back! After crashing on NYE and being down 6 days, courtneylovegavin.com /courtneylovegavin.com is up and running! If you've been trying to get in touch about Perfectionism Leveraged 1-1 coaching, now's your chance! Go to courtneylovegavin.com/contact /courtneylovegavin.com/contact If you want to hear all about the hard-earned truths in resilience from this digital dumpster fire week and what REALLY happens when your life goes up in flames but you were supposed to be doing all these other things and you're a perfectionist and you throw yourself a pouty party, listen to episode 200 of Perfectionism Rewired.  PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neuorinclusivity movement that sees all humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

1m
Jan 07
Medical Gaslighting: It’s Not You, It’s Your Misdiagnosis

Medical Gaslighting Exposed. You’ve been going to psychotherapy for months, doing everything your doctor tells you, but it’s 5 steps forward, 5 steps back. When you voice your concerns, they’re brushed off or quick to prescribe a symptom suppressor😔 It's not just you – medical gaslighting occurs universally with high—functioning perfectionists especially if you identify as a woman, trans, non-binary or person of color.  How to detect when your coach, counselor, psychiatrist, psychotherapist, clinician or doctor is doing more harm than help. Listen in for an eye-opening episode with strategies for perfectionist self-advocacy, navigating the lethal landmines of mental healthcare, partnering with the right perfectionist practitioner for you in the face of medical gaslighting and getting the care you deserve NOW that sees you as a whole person, not just a set of symptoms. Who seeks to understand, not to diagnose.  Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you join Perfectionism Leveraged https://courtneylovegavin.com/contact you get customized 1-1 coaching + the SKILLS you've never been taught that FREE you from sunk cost fallacy + lethal perfectionism landmines. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/services   POSITIVE PERFECTIONIST PRACTICES TO DEAL WITH MEDICAL GASLIGHTING: __ __   HIGHLIGHTS INSIDE EPISODE 199 OF PERFECTIONISM REWIRED: 00:00-Feeling Dismissed? How To Spot Medical Gaslighting 02:13-Dangers of Deferring to External Authority 02:43-At Risk: People of Color, Women, Non-Binary + Trans 03:41-What does gaslighting mean for perfectionists 04:42- Obstacles of Symptom Suppression for High-Functioning Perfectionists 06:08-Illness vs. Wellness Frameworks + Holistic Approach 09:53-Health professionals pathologize, causing hypervigilance and reactivity. 10:43-Limitations of Medication in Treating Perfectionism 14:22-How to Respond To Gaslighting 14:34-IRL Gaslighting Examples: Life Coach School, Lizard Brain, Polyvagal Theory 15:12-Perfectionist Powerhouse Serena Williams' Experience with Medical Gaslighting 16-13-Practical Steps for Self-Advocacy in Medical Gaslighting 17:49-Choosing the Right Practitioner for YOU 18:24-Partnering with Perfectionist Affirming Practitioners 20:19-Empowering Yourself as CEO of Y.O.U,   RICH RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS GASLIGHTING EPISODE: __ __   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES ON MEDICAL GASLIGHTING REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE:   __ __ PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neuorinclusivity movement that sees all humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

22m
Jan 03
Perfectionist Sunk Cost Fallacy: When Loyalty Becomes Lethal

Discover how the perfectionist sunk cost fallacy could be holding you back and learn how to break free from its grip. From wearing clothes you hate, to staying in relationships or careers way past their expiration date, Sunk Cost fallacy is a lethal landmine for perfectionistic people. Find out if you’re making decisions aligned with your values or loss aversion, sunk cost definition for perfectionists, tricks sunk cost effect plays on you, why its challenging to see your own sunk costs, IRL sunk cost fallacy examples and how perfectionists can stop falling prey to sunk cost suck-i-ness forever. Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you join Perfectionism Leveraged https://courtneylovegavin.com/contact you get customized 1-1 coaching + the SKILLS you've never been taught that FREE you from sunk cost fallacy + lethal perfectionism landmines. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/services POSITIVE PERFECTIONIST PRACTICES FOR REMOVING SUNK COST FALLACY: __ __ HIGHLIGHTS INSIDE EPISODE 198 OF PERFECTIONISM REWIRED: 00:00-Perfectionists + Sunk Costs 01:51-What is sunk cost fallacy 03:26-Shedding the Weight of Sunk Costs 04:56-Being Resourceful instead of limiting your resources 05:36-Sunk Cost Effect in Unfulfilling Careers + Unhappy Relationships 07:12-Why FEELS Smart To Continue Pouring Money, time, effort when you've already sunk 09:18-Putting yourself in the victim drama triangle 11:10-Sunk Cost With Example Baby Gucci Loafers 12:03-Quick Correct Choices with Embodied Presence Interoceptive Connection 13:32-when to persevere and when to pivot 14:36-Prioritizing your values over sunk costs 15:50-No longer a victim to chronic overachieving 18:17-Proud of yourself regardless of how much you accomplish RICH RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS SUNK COST EPISODE: __ __ HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES ON SUNK COST REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE:   __ __ ‌‌‌ PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens. WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neuorinclusivity movement that sees all humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently.

19m
Jan 01
When You Get Support & It *Sucks* Navigating Advocating as a Perfectionist

Sometimes, support sucks. As a perfectionist this gets especially tricky when you're also wobbly on advocating for yourself. If you've ever felt trapped by your own high expectations this episode breaks down the barriers that perfectionists often face when it comes to asking for and receiving support, illuminating the internal struggles and external pressures that's enormously misunderstood by non-perfectionistic people.  Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you join Perfectionism Leveraged you get customized 1-1 coaching + the SKILLS you've never been taught that FREE you from panic + controlling everything  all the time. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/services   HIGHLIGHTS INSIDE EPISODE 197 OF PERFECTIONISM REWIRED: 00:00-Self-Advocacy When Support Falls Short 02:22-Feel like a weirdo when your internal experience is icky and you're still doing phenomenally on the outside  04:00-A Fvck Down vs A Fvck Up 06:10-Going Where Your Perfectionism Growth Area IS 07:22-Empowered Responsibilty + Perfectionist Self-Advocacy IRL 07:40-Perfectionism Leveraged Client Feedback 08:11-Being a perfectionist in public 09:29-What really matters when support fails you 10:35-Two Questions All Perfectionists Need After They Encounter A Mistake 11:05- Why endure perfectionism when you can enjoy it instead?   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE:   __ __ ‌‌‌ PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens.    WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees no “correct” way for the brain to work and humans as unique individuals who all experience the world differently.

12m
Dec 29, 2023
Upgrading Panic + Control to Power + Presence: Nurturing Your Perfectionistic Brain

In this episode CLG lays out the shortest, simplest pathway to the result perfectionists actually want: power, peace and presence with a special focus on parenting and daily life.  Discover the root of control versus power, the outdated strategies not designed for perfectionistic brains very widely used in psychotherapy and why they’re ultimately harmful to perfectionists in the long-run. Imagine steering a tiny dinghy in stormy seas. That's control. Now, picture yourself commanding a majestic yacht, gliding effortlessly over the waves. That's power. That’s this episode.  Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you join Perfectionism Leveraged you get customized 1-1 coaching + the SKILLS you've never been taught that FREE you from panic + controlling everything  all the time. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized IN THIS EPISODE YOU’LL LEARN: __ __   HIGHLIGHTS INSIDE YOUR HOLIDAY PRESENT FROM PERFECTIONISM REWIRED: 00:00-Holiday gift: Upgrading from control to power 01:52-Understanding the impact of controlling perfectionistic tendencies on daily life 03:11-Felt Safety: Why your environment doesn't determine your safety and what does 05:53-Hidden motivations secretly fueling perfectionism anxiety 07:22-The Power Perfectionist: How detaching from outcomes is the POWER MOVE 09:00-Mindfulness Strategies for stepping off the hamster wheel from hell (Control Loops) 10:42-Distinction between needing and wanting to do something 13:14-Perks of living in Present Time + enhancing perfectionist productivity 15:04-Being responsive instead of reactive 16:54-Truth Booth: Extremely Controlling In Relationships 18:37-Holism, person-emotion-action = presence in your window of tolerance 19:54-Exploring embodied presence and interoceptive connection 20:20-Your EPIC Framework: Practical tools for perfectionists to tune in + build permanent resilience 23:03-Recognizing the generational impact of self-regulation on perfectionism   -Courtney Love Gavin, Perfectionism Rewired Podcast Ep. 196   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE:   __ __ ‌‌ PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens.    WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees no “correct” way for the brain to work and humans as unique individuals who all experience the world differently.

24m
Dec 27, 2023
Not A Popularity Contest but if it was...You're Winning!

When you stop trying to get people to like you or validate you (or listen to your podcast) this wild phenomenon occurs: You become popular! Plot twist that makes you pause as to why for sooooo long you tried soooo hard and cared soooo much about being well received it never happened. Happy surprises + insights inside.  In a world of quick fixes, you deserve lasting change. Experience the embodied Presence of rewiring your perfectionistic tendencies inside PERFECTIONISM LEVERAGED, THE ONLY NEUROSCIENCE-BACKED 1-1 COACHING THAT GIVES YOU THE ABILITIES TO CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS AND FEEL AS PUT TOGETHER AS YOUR LIFE LOOKS. To see if PERFECTIONISM LEVERAGED might be the answer you’ve been looking for, go to https://courtneylovegavin.com IN THIS EPISODE OF PERFECTIONISM REWIRED PODCAST YOU’LL DISCOVER: __ __ WHAT'S INSIDE THIS EPISODE: 00:00-Love Language of Gift Giving 02:28-Special Holiday Gift Announcement For Perfectionism Rewired community 02:43-Perfectionism Is The New ADHD 03:17-Global Reach: Top NEW Listener Countries 04:37-Most Shared Episode on Spotify "Why Am I Self Sabotaging?" 06:04-The Significance of 99 Spotify Fans 07:09-CLG Punitive Perfectionism IRL 08:11-Looking at your own data without the drama 09:15-Perfectionism Impacts 92% of Global Population 1 11:09-What Happens When You're Present PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired https://perfectionismrewired.com/ podcast is brought to you by Perfectionist Solutions https://courtneylovegavin.com/ and is committed to neuroscience truth and accuracy through a perfectionism affirming lens.    WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionism affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits  to be “fixed” and nobody is a victim of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU, given tools for agency and perfectionism is leveraged to work you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees no “correct” way for the brain to work and humans as unique individuals who all experience the world differently.

13m
Dec 25, 2023
Everything You Need to Know About Self Regulation as a Perfectionist

 Can’t seem to calm down despite taking deep breaths, memorizing ALL the coping skills + “knowing” what to do? Forget about those dusty generic strategies. Discover the HIDDEN self-regulation skill that no one's told you about until now! Get the relief, control and answers you’ve been longing for with tailored, effective emotional resilience methods that work for YOU. You’ll learn to recognize those subtle, personal cues that tell you stress is creeping in so you can take control. And the coolest part? You’ll learn how to combat it on the spot – whether you’re dealing with an annoying colleague who’s blowing you up on Slack, a last minute snafu in your rigorously relaxed vacation itinerary, or even a cranky mother-in-law (we all have one, don’t we?). Join CLG in making emotional poise and resilience your new normal. PS. If you're like WTF is Interoception listen to Perfectionism Rewired podcast Ep. 193 https://perfectionismrewired.com/episode/what-perfectionists-worry-about-isnt-the-problem-this-is  to listen go to: https://bit.ly/interoception411   🌟GOT PRESENCE? 🌟 https://courtneylovegavin.com/ In a world of quick fixes, you deserve lasting change. Experience the embodied Presence of rewiring your perfectionistic tendencies and whole self-regulation, inside Perfectionism Leveraged, the only neuroscience-backed 1-1 coaching that gives you the abilities to control YOUR emotions, not just situations and finally feel as put together as your life looks. You ready to quit fighting against yourself and start enjoying the life you’ve worked so hard to create.? To see if PERFECTIONISM LEVERAGED might be the sustainable solution you’ve been searching for, go to https://courtneylovegavin.com   IN THIS EPISODE OF PERFECTIONISM REWIRED PODCAST YOU’LL DISCOVER: __ __   HERE'S A GLANCE AT EPISODE 194: 00:00-Introduction 01:23-What is self regulation 02:09-Coping Strategies for Perfectionists 03:17-Building resilience in stressful situations 04:48-Why Anxiety Coping Skills don’t help with intense emotions 06:11-What doctors, therapists and clinicians miss that stunt your emotional intelligence 07:29-The Root of Effective Self Regulation Skills 08:48-Why traditional self regulation approaches fall short for perfectionists 10:23-How to build emotional resilience 12:31-More effective approach to emotional self regulation for perfectionists   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN EP. 194 INCLUDE: __ __   PERFECTIONISM REWIRED ETHICS + TRANSPARENCY: Perfectionism Rewired is committed to neuro-scientific truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens.    WHAT DOES PERFECTIONIST AFFIRMING MEAN? Perfectionistic affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not deficits  to be “fixed” and humans are not victims of perfectionism. Instead you are fully in charge of YOU and perfectionism is leveraged. Part of neurodiversity affirming movement that sees humans as unique individuals who all experience the world differently. 

13m
Dec 19, 2023
What Perfectionists Worry About Isn't The Problem *This* Is

Your Perfectionistic Brain does NOT work the way you think it does. Your brain predicts *almost* everything you feel, think, do, and when it gets it wrong, it's called a prediction error. Get up to speed on prediction errors and how speaking Interoception will save your sanity as a perfectionist and might just change your life. 9.5 out of 10 Perfectionists can't easily move on from mistakes. Are you one of them? Stop going through life illiterate and get fluent in the only language that makes you feel even better than your life looks inside  Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 1-1 coaching + in-depth personalized support rewiring your perfectionism Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   PERFECTIONISM REWIRED EPISODE 193 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Introduction  01:33-Misinformation About Perfectionism + How Your Brain Works 01:47-Perfectionist Solutions Methodology Credibility and Scientific Citations 03:06-IRL Perfectionist Client Testimonial: Overcoming Perfectionism 04:33-Ruminating Perfectionist Thinking 04:50-Perfectionist Misinterpretations in Professional Settings 05:27-Perfectionist's Parenting Concerns and Self-Judgment 05:42-Personal Impact of Perfectionist Thoughts 05:57-Physical Manifestations of Perfectionist Anxiety 06:18-Misunderstood Perfectionist Fears 06:33-Boss's Positive Feedback Contrasting Perfectionist Prediction Error 06:55-The Role of Brain Predictions in Perfectionist Thoughts 07:21-Examining Sensory Data's Influence on Perfectionism 07:31-Perfectionist Tendencies in Analyzing Mistakes 07:55-The Role of Prediction Errors in Perfectionist Anxiety 08:14-Science of Prediction Errors and Perfectionism 08:39-Effectiveness of Predicting and Correcting in Perfectionism 09:00-Brain's Predictive Processes and Perfectionism 09:25-Reducing Uncertainty: Brain's Metabolic Efficiency 09:28-Trippy Example of Brain's Prediction In Action 09:36-Sensory Integration and Brain's Construction of Wetness 10:06-Brain's Reality Construction Using Memories and Sensory Data 10:18-Brain's Use of Sensory Data to Construct Reality 10:56-Brain's Sensory Data Interpretation 11:11-Brain's Guesswork in Processing Sensory Data 11:24-Intristic Neural Network and Need for Quick Decision-Making 11:49-Your Role in Interpreting Sensory Data 11:53-Why Interoception Is Pivotal Perfectionists 13:01-Difficulties in Implementing Interoceptive Skills 13:28-Overcoming the Difficult Phase in Learning New Skills 13:55-Importance of Perfectionist Interoception 14:17-Perfectionists’s Role vs Brain’s Role in Interoception 14:27-Are you Interoceptive Illiterate? 14:41-Human Brain's Millisecond Decision-Making 14:59-Brain's Predictive Nature 15:12-Linking Perfectionism to Brain Predictions 15:35-Dopamine as the Predictor Neurotransmitter 15:52-Where Do Predictions Come From? 16:14-Curating Your Perfectionist Information Diet 16:29-Impact of Global PR and Information Control 16:52-Profitability in Keeping Perfectionists Stuck, Suck + Sick 17:11-Empowering Perfectionists for Change 17:50-How To Improve Your Perfectionist Prediction Errors 18:13-Real-Life Scenario and Prediction Errors 18:30-Misinterpretation of Communication 18:44-The Importance of Learning Interoception 19:05-PreEmptive Prediction in Daily Life 19:16-Anticipating Surprises 19:47-Perfectionist Parenting and Prediction 19:53-Recognizing Child's Behavioral Signs 20:01-Fluency in Interoception   HIGHLY CREDIBLE SOURCES REFERENCED IN EP. 193 INCLUDE: __ __

21m
Dec 16, 2023
When Taking A Few Deep Breaths Isn't Enough

NONE of the strategies for overcoming perfectionism worked for me. Perfectionism Recovery made me feel even worse (I l😍ve giving my ALL!). Changing my thoughts was impossible bc I had SO MANY. Meditation made me feel incompetent bc it was so hard to quiet my mind. Therapy left me feeling better in the moment but then anxious AF when reality hits + IDK the ‘correct’ tool to use..For decades I believed I was defective. It was ALL.my.fault I couldn’t get what works great for everyone else on Earth to work for me. Harder I tried, more crippled by perfectionism I became.. UNTIL one day I discovered conventional therapies aren’t made to grasp the highly-nuanced nature of perfectionism AND the compliance, top-down approach, actually exacerbates the worst parts of perfectionism. If you've ever felt misunderstood or frustrated bc what you're trying isn't working, this episode will make it all make sense. PS- Don't take my word for it. Hear real-life stories from perfectionists who had just about given up before finding Perfectionism Optimized.  VISUAL MODEL OF GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE + PERFECTIONISM AREAS OF INFLUENCE: https://pin.it/5uJ7Qp6 Tired of waiting for “things to calm down” so you can FEEL better? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, the ability to fall asleep without obsessing over your to do list or PRESENCE with your family (no more catastrophizing) When you join Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized you get 1-1 coaching + the SKILLS you've never been taught that save you from living anxiously all the time. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized IN THIS EPISODE YOU’LL LEARN: EPSISODE 192 TIMESTAMPS: 01:13-Struggling with perfectionism? It’s not You. It’s… 02:18-Playing the wait and see strategy out until a crisis 03:27- How the Perfectionist Playbooks come in clutch 05:00-When You Have Nobody To Turn To or Who Understands 06:15-Inner Experience of Being A Perfectionist 07:30-How complying with the rules to earn the reward, screws over perfectionists 08:16-When Therapy Makes Perfectionism Worse (IRL client example) 09:54-Why Compliance Driven Support DOES NOT work for perfectionists 10:26-When Deep Breathing Just Isn’t Cutting It. This.is.WHY 11:12-Dangers of hierarchical support like doctor + patient 12:54-Confused bc taking deep breaths is supposed to be relaxing 13:18-What lies beneath the surface of perfectionism is what’s controlling it 13:30-Why it feels like you're playing a game of whack a mole, 14:00-How Perfectionistic Habits are like the Golden Gate Bridge 15:02-Love Researching, learning  or self-diagnose? LISTEN UP 15:44-If deep breathing is not enough, what is? 16:30-The one thing that makes changes easy to do 17:21-Surprising changes for Carly + her young kids with a perfectionist-affirming coach 18:14-Practical tools for daily application even during hectic days 19:23-Why Neurosculpting Works 20:00-Secret Way Human Bodies decide how anxious or calm to be 21:05-Sneak Preview of next episode

21m
Dec 10, 2023
Got that “I have too much to do!!!” feeling!?

Imagine a Spacious. Calm. Relaxed. Cozy. JoyFULL. Invigorating...End of your year. If you're sick of feeling burned out by NYE, you’ve GOT to take advantage of the holiday coaching special I'm offering inside Perfectionism Optimized where you’ll get personalized support to help you: stop stressy anxiety from creeping into your body + hijacking your mind, calmly navigate family dynamics and honor your boundaries without guilt. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized

1m
Dec 10, 2023
When You're Mortified You Made SUCH A Careless Mistake

If you find yourself dwelling on a *mistake* you made for weeks, months (years!) or can’t stop feeling embarrassed/disappointed in yourself for “messing up” THIS episode will help you move forward and playfully break free from your own 'mistake prisons'  Take a rare real-time journey inside the mind of a perfectionist (CLG) who JUST made a very public (very careless) mistake and explore the intricacies of dealing with rejection sensitivity, taking decisive uncomfy action and what all-or-nothing thinking has to do with it.  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Make your life YOURS and actually ENJOY it along the way inside  Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized where you'll get  cutting-edge neuroscience tools to stop stress from pulling you out of the present moment and  we'll retrain the way your brain responds to mistakes so they can no longer f#ck with your Joy.  Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   EPSISODE 191 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Introduction to Perfectionism Rewired 01:49-When you make gorgeous plans, but you don't follow through on them 03:03-Exploring Rejection Sensitivity in Perfectionists 03:17-CLG's mistake very publicly on the podcast 04:19-Inside the all or nothing thinking going on in CLG's head 05:00-Understanding how to navigate the complexities of your perfectionism 06:17-Have self-awareness around perfectionistic tendencies but stuck in indecision 06:38-Paper thinking = flushing the toilet in your head 07:15-You think there's this one right decision out there  07:49-Constructing alibis for your "failures" instead of moving through mistakes 08:15-What Perfectionism Comes Down To 09:15-When you're mortified you made such a careless mistake 10:01-Only when you  hear how you talk to yourself do you actually know where YOUR best decision is 11:08-Making a mistake is an opportunity to throat punch yourself 11:25-How building up your capacity to make mistakes is like running stairs 12:43-I made mistakes and I had a lot of really crappy thoughts about myself  13:30-Mindlessly going from task to task instead of gaining the skills to make a mistake + level up 14:33-You stop giving power to the past it loses its power over you and you become the one in charge 15:12-Calmly and confidently making mistakes is a skill 15:58-The fastest way to figure out what's really underneath your perfectionistic patterns

16m
Dec 07, 2023
Obsessing Over Your Mistakes

Mistakes are the scabs perfectionists love to pick, even if they make us bleed + leave a heinous scar that only we can see. Find out the top 5 reasons perfectionists are conditioned to be like moths drawn to the flame of mistakes, why overthinking mistakes feels like an addiction to your brain,  the RIGHT way to handle mistakes so you don't keep making the same ones on repeat, even if you're in a high-stakes career where precision is a MUST.  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Make your life YOURS and actually ENJOY it along the way inside  Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized where you'll get  cutting-edge neuroscience tools to stop stress from pulling you out of the present moment and  we'll retrain the way your brain responds to mistakes so they can no longer f#ck with your Joy.  Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Listen to the full episode to hear: __ __   EPSISODE 190 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Introduction to Perfectionism Rewired 01:43-Cringeworthy Moment When My Obsession Over Small Mistakes Injured My Career 02:26-When You Get 100 Gold Stars But All You Can Think About Is the 1 Nastygram 03:05-Top Five Reasons Perfectionists Are Conditioned To Handle Mistakes Wrong 04:48-How Mistakes Are Like The Weather  05:50-Penalized For Mistakes As A Kid + Stuff Taken Away 06:25-The Correct Way To Obsess Over Mistakes  07:00-WHY am I obsessed with this every small mistake? I should be happy 07:12-You believe the mistakes mean something deeper about you 07:57-Your Reticular Activating System Is Trained To Fetch All Your Mistakes 08:13-How Neurosculpting Rewires Your Pattern + Gives You Better Sources of Dopamine 08:35-Your Career Demands Precision + is High-Stakes 09:11-How To Turn Those 'oops' Moments into Enjoyable A-HA Moments

10m
Dec 05, 2023
Calm Anxiety + Take Control With the Worry Window

Discover the simple technique that rewires your brain, empowering you to take control of your anxiety, worry and catastrophizing. Stay focused on this for 21 days and reduce your stress by 50%. Start now for a calmer, more present you. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Build confidence from being fully in charge of your life, through the proven, science-backed tools in  Perfectionism Optimized https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized is non negotiable. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Listen to the full episode to hear: __ __ RESOURCES MENTIONED: __ __   EPSISODE 189 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00-Introduction to Perfectionism Rewired 01:25-Tool Helps Perfectionist Parents and Kids with Anxiety Relief 02:03-CLG's Journey with Anxiety + Panic Attacks 03:37-Two Biggest Stress Mistakes Perfectionists Make  04:02-The Science Behind Stress and Perfectionism 06:03-Unveiling the Worry Window Technique 07:33-Power of Choosing When You Worry 09:36-Customizing How To Stop Worrying Technique 12:18-Impact of Paper Thinking on Panic 13:23-Potty Training Your Perfectionism + Stress 14:33-How You Get Your Unconscious Playing on Your Team 15:16-Will Worry Window make me worry more?  16:00-Why Logicalizing Doesn't Work with Perfectionism and Anxiety 16:52-How To Cut Your Anxiety In Half in 21 Days

18m
Dec 04, 2023