Fertility Rewire Podcast
About
Available on
Community
64 episodes
Hello and welcome to this episode of the Fertility Rewire podcast. Now, it's been a while. Again, I've taken a break. I've actually really, I've got quite a neck injury and I've been wearing a neck brace and have had the same sort of battle with my healthcare that I know you face a lot with your fertility, but you know, I've stuck with it. I've got to the route that I need to be taking now and things are improving massively. So I'm back doing everything that I was before. So you may have seen me on TikTok more recently talking quite a lot about spotting and signs of low progesterone. And these videos have created lots of conversations with people getting in touch with me. And we are really starting, I think in the fertility community. And when I say that, I mean you guys who are trying to get pregnant really starting to try and understand, I hope, about progesterone and people are starting to see it as a potential reason why they're not falling pregnant. Now it may well be, but like all things, it's a symptom and we need to look for the cause. So if your progesterone is low, then there will be a reason for that. And the reason in itself might not only affect progesterone, but it may affect other aspects of fertility. So a sticking plaster is not necessarily what we need now. So I'm going to explore in this episode with you a little bit more about spotting because I know that you'll be told that spotting is normal potentially. And you know what? For some people it is. But we have this gauge of normal, don't we? So, if you are spotting, join me by listening into this episode listened, and think what factors might be there. If you need any more support on how to find that out, then please get in touch. You can get in touch by email kat@fertility rewire.com. You can get in touch with me via socials on Instagram and TikTok. It would be great to hear from you and also if you've got any thoughts on the podcast, you know, how are you enjoying it, what more would you like me to do? Is there anything specific you want me to cover? Then please get in touch. But as ever, take care. https://proovtest.com/products/proov-test-strips Use Code FERTILITYREWIRE https://www.tiktok.com/kat_fertilityrewire
It was a great pleasure to chat with Hoopsy Founder Lara Solomon in this episode where we discuss hope, support and saving the environment when trying to get pregnant. Hoopsy provide resources and information to those trying to conceive, as well as an eco friendly pregnancy test, made from99% paper (that doesn’t get wet) and is 99% accurate at a comparable cost to plastic single use tests. Lara talks about her realization about the amount of single use plastic used during her own IVF treatment and it prompted her to start investigating the possibility of an eco friendly version. We also discussed the upcoming ovulation tests, and an online support community coming in February. If you wanted to get a free sample of the pregnancy test, you can do so via the link below https://www.hoopsy.co/pregnancy-test-giveaway
It can be a time of dread and fear cant it? Family gatherings, the questions you know you'll get asked. But what will you reply? Do you smile politely, still keeping this very personal subject to yourself, or do you let them have it: None of your business! Its a time for family, and the sense of loss can be huge, overwhelming even. I want to give a sense of hope this christmas. My wish for you is that you start to understand what could be affecting your fertility, that you have can put steps into place to enhance your fertility and ease the emotional burden you carry. I've helped 100’s of couples achieve this and I’m sharing my knowledge and proven treatment plan with you in the digital packs. And for a limited time offer you can access free support from me. You can access the digital pack here
Feeling lost is something I hear a lot from my clients and people i speak to about their fertility struggles. The thing about being lost is that we are often looking for the way out, but before we can truly do that we have to know where we are. I discuss how we can do that, how we need trusted sources and once we know where we are we can get help to get to where we need to go, or help to know where we need to be going next. I also announce the launch of the new Conceivable digital programme You can get your hands on that here, and fo a limited time I’m trialing a free support option too (DEC 2022)
It’s hard to stick to all the things that you are trying to improve your chances of getting pregnant, especially if you don’t really know why you are doing them or know if they are working. I was recently called out on this a bit with my own business. What was my motivation? Well my motivation was to of course get clients that I can help, and to educate and advocate for couples through my podcast. So why haven't recorded an episode for months? Well I've been poorly, my kids have been poorly, I've had covid, I've had migraines, I have my clients and limited time. Was I feeling deflated, do I lack motivation? Well actually what I have been lacking, is discipline and I talk about this in this episode regarding your fertility journey? How can you be motivated when you don’t see results? Are you looking for the big result and not noticing the micro results that are adding up? Do you understand, trust and believe in the actions you are taking, or is this lind faith because someone else has done this? Are your stress/worry levels so high due toall the things you are trying with no results, of having no answers? When you trust in the process or the person advising the process, you can get discipline your actions because you trust them? Well this is how I support my clients, every day. Click here for my free guide 6 things stopping yu getting pregnant
It's a viscous circle: stress affects ovulation, and as you no doubt no ovulations affects stress. As a result it can also impact other areas of your life. In this episode I discuss the stress of ovulation, why it impacts your fertility and what you can do about it. So there is potentially a lot, you don't know, but there is a lot you can know. So if you want to get more answers, if you want to get the answers or even find the right questions, so you can get the answers, then I can help with that. So if that's something you want to reach out, get in touch, can get me on socials at fertility, rewire or kat@fertilityrewire.com or book an insight call. TRANSCRIPT In this episode, I'm going to talk about the stress of ovulation, which if you've been trying to get pregnant, whether that be with your first, second or further children, you may well really identify with this and see this as being an issue. So my first question for you is, do you know when you ovulate, have you always known when you ovulate, are you still unsure or have you recently found out that it's not at all when you thought it was. I often talk about how, what we're taught in school. Isn't actually relevant to what we need to know when it comes to trying to get pregnant. We often have this idea that we all ovulate on day 14 in the holy grail of 28 day cycle. But actually, even if you had a 28 day cycle, it's not guaranteed that you would ovulate on day 14. I know some people have been informed from a medical professional that they will ovulate 14 days after their period starts. And other people have been told that they will ovulate 14 days before their period starts. None of which is a guarantee, none of which is true for all. I have worked with some clients over the years where the only issue in their fertility journey was that they weren't completely sure when they were ovulating. Often it's that they were ovulating a lot later than they thought. So it was when working together quite a quick win for many. And sometimes it can be as simple as that, but we know it's not, we know, as I've said many times that there are many, many factors involved. And we also know that we are not looking for further information when we're going through the doctors necessarily. OVULATION SIGNS So do you know your signs of ovulation? Now, this is something I discussed earlier in the podcast in episode six. So that's worth the listen, if you haven't already listened to that one where I talk about ovulation signs. So naturally, when you ovulate, think about us as animals, not as logical overthinking at times, humans, but as animals, your body tells you it's time to reproduce. So your libido will be increased and you will have changing cervical mucus that will change over this fertility window. The type of mucus varies as we get nearer to ovulation, it's very choosy early on as to which sperm it let through. And the nearer to ovulation, as I've talked about in the episode six, it's going to let anything through at this point. So it is important to know what that mucus means and what it demonstrates. STRESS AND OVULATION We know that stress, anxiety, worry, fear affects ovulation. It's a very natural process in the body. It's a fantastic process to keep you safe because ultimately the first job of your body is for you to stay alive. It's second job is for you to have sustenance for you to continue. So to stay alive in the moment of danger and then to stay healthy and alive. And it's third job, and this is a hierarchy is procreation. So unless those other two are in place, as I've talked about before, procreation is going to come very, very low down on the list. So at times when your body feels you are in imminent danger in the past, this would be with predators. And I talk about tigers a lot, and Tiger Taming is something I work with my clients. It's a way to address this stress, worry, anxiety, and fear, and bring your body back into balance and help your fertility. So, when you are faced with a tiger, then your body, your hypothalamus, pituitary, adrenal access is working to ensure that everything is put into staying alive. And when everything is put into staying alive, then other aspects are switched down or switched off and ovulation can be one of these. Okay? So it could be that ovulation comes later, or it could be that you don't ovulate at all, as well as that, what we also know is not only can, and I hate using the word stress, but, but when your emotional health is, is, is unbalanced. When there is fear and worry and anxiety in place, it will affect ovulation, but equally ovulation can in fact be the cause of the stress, the worry and the fear. So it's in effect of, um, working with this to try and get the balance. Now, as you know, I hope you know that I will never tell you to just relax. Relaxing can be really, really difficult. So, when we look at your tigers, and again, I've talked about this many times before, but I'm going to talk specifically about your ovulation tigers and your tigers are your thoughts, your fears, and your worries. So what are the thoughts that are running through your head around the time of ovulation? What are those thoughts? What, what ifs do you have? What if I'm not ovulating? What if I don't get pregnant this month? I may never get pregnant. How do I know that this is the right time? How do I know that I'm ovulating? What if it's me? What if your partner isn't going to be around during the magic window and WHAT IS YOUR MAGIC WINDOW? What is the time you have put aside, or you have in your mind that is your magic window. And I hope your answer will be the period of seven days before ovulation. So that's what I work with, with my clients. And we look at that in different stages in order to maximize your chances of getting pregnant, because remember the egg lives for up to 24 hours. The sperm lives for three to five days can be up to seven. And I've repeated this time and time again. I know, but if you think about that, the design of the body is that the sperm needs to be there, ready. It needs to be there ready and waiting for when that egg is released. If you wait for ovulation, you may well miss. Also, if this is the first time you've had sex in a while at ovulation, you could be some quite dodgy sperm. That's not a medical term, but you know what I mean. There could be some dodgy sperm in that ejaculate at that point, the other thing is, what are you doing to analyze when you are ovulating? Are you using your body signs? Have you used ovulation predictor sticks before, or perhaps temperature charting?. And if you know that you're very regular and you know, when you ovulate, are you still peeing on ovation sticks around this time? Or do you have irregular periods now, or maybe even you have absent periods? I have clients who have a cycle every 28 days who aren't ovulating. So you can have anovulatory cycles and there are many things that cause this, that we can look into that we can start to learn more about. But if you are peeing on ovulation sticks every month, this in itself can cause a stress. This in a sense can cause that anxiety and switch down those natural signs of ovulation and maybe even be switching down ovulation itself, also ovulation predictor sticks. aren't always accurate. So if you have polycystic ovary syndrome, particularly you will have quite regular hormone surges potentially that don't lead to ovulation. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO? What can you do to support yourself at this time to know more about ovulation and to get in a better head space for it? So rather than reading everything and sending yourself crazy with your Google searches, I would suggest that you choose some, just a few sites that you find useful to support your fertility journey. You could work with somebody like myself to support you. Of course, when you are looking on the internet, when you are looking at social media, and I've mentioned this phrase before, don't just look at what Jane did, because the factors affecting Jane might be very different to the factors affecting you and also going to be a bit controversial, but this is my message, don't just believe what your doctor is telling you. I'm sorry, but your family doctor is not a fertility expert. And when you go to the fertility clinic, what you are really looking at there are assisted methods of conception. So if you really want to get a handle on ovulation, then it's important that you truly know and understand what is going on personally for you with ovulation, that you understand your body's signs. Now I've talked about ovulation pain before in an episode, ovulation pain is not a positive sign, always of ovulation. So don't think, oh, I get pain. So that's really good. So I know when I ovulate, we need to look a little bit further into that, especially. So when you understand your body and know the signs, you can develop a sense of trust in your body. And when you have a sense of trust that can in effect, start, start to support the reduction of the fear and the worry and anxiety, and the more understanding, and the more sound information with an action plan that you have, the more in control you can feel because let's face it. We don't feel in control of this at all. You can of course use ovulation predictor kits, but it's important to know when to use them. And it's important to identify what stress they in themselves are causing for you. So when I'm working with clients, we monitor the cycle. And I say, we, because I ask my clients to gather the data and I analyse the data because looking at that data and trying to analyse what it means can send you into anxiety, worry, stress, and fear. So whether you are doing your basal body temperature, and it's important to know the right way to do it, first thing in the morning, as soon as you wake, before you do anything else at all. And I encourage my clients to chart this on an app called fertility friend, it can be a bit overwhelming for you as an individual, but it gives me an incredible amount of detail about all parts of the cycle, not just ovation. We can see slow rises in ovulation. We can see a strength of ovulation and that's really, really key as well. And also the magical Luteal phase. If you are using a fertility analyser, such as MIRA then you can see there, your oestrogen and your lutenising hormone to give you that picture of ovulation, but what you can also do now with their additional wands that they have is that you can measure the progesterone as well. And that's really, really powerful. And don't forget that progesterone production starts after you ovulate. So if you've had a blood test to look at your progesterone and the progesterone is low, if it's super low, that might mean you're not ovulating, or if it's low, it might mean that the ovulation isn't very strong. So there's lots that progesterone can tell us as well. It's also really, really important to look at the wider aspects affecting fertility. Remember your egg is a cell. So your cellular health is really key when it comes to nutrition and also oxidative stress can have an effect on your cellular health oxidative stress that is in the body as a result of emotional stress, as well as physical stress on the body. So it's key to look at some key deficiencies that might be affecting your cellular health as well. And of course the pelvic health itself. So is there sufficient space in your pelvis in episode nine, I chatted with Claire Mockridge about, does your womb have enough room? You know, is it trying to do its job from behind a wardrobe in effect? So what is the pelvic space like? What's been affecting that particular area. What might be impacting ovulation? Have your reproductive organs got enough room in there? Is it been affected by endometriosis or possibly any adhesions or scarring? And also if you've had a previous child and you're trying to get pregnant again, there might be effects from your previous pregnancy and birth that could be having an impact as well. And we also know that ovulation and when you ovulate changes, it's not always the same as it was. It does change throughout your life cycle So there is potentially a lot, you don't know, but there is a lot you can know. So if you want to get more answers, if you want to get the answers or even find the right questions, so you can get the answers, then I can help with that. So if that's something you want to reach out, get in touch, can get me on socials at fertility, rewire or kat@fertilityrewire.com or book an insight call. I hope that there is sufficient information here in this podcast. And in the podcast episodes, I've mentioned episode six and episode nine, that might give you more information and might arm you with the information to get the answers that you need, and to be able to interpret those answers as well. If you haven't heard already. I have a group program: as well as working one to one with anybody experiencing fertility issues. I have a group program that where I'm working with people who are trying to get pregnant again. So trying to extend their family and the specifics involved in that. And then also, just before I go, if you have these tigers that need taming, if you have an ovation tiger, a timing tiger, a getting pregnant tiger, a worry, you know, these tigers that are there. I do have a tiger Taming program, which is a four week online program. and if you want more information about that, then again, reach out and I’ll point you in the right direction
Its a viscius circle, stress affects ovulation, ovulation affects stress. This is our focus isn't it when trying to get pregnant, we chart, we test, we plan and it can be a hugely stressful time. Particularly the longer you have been trying, or if you don't have a regular ovulation. In this episode I dig a little deeper, discuss the ovulation tigers, the What If's you may have and what you are doing to determine when you are ovulating. Transcript In this episode, I'm going to talk about the stress of ovulation, which if you've been trying to get pregnant, whether that be with your first, second or further children, you may well really identify with this and see this as being an issue. So my first question for you is, do you know when you ovulate, have you always known when you ovulate, are you still unsure or have you recently found out that it's not at all when you thought it was. I often talk about how, what we're taught in school. Isn't actually relevant to what we need to know when it comes to trying to get pregnant. We often have this idea that we all ovulate on day 14 in the holy grail of 28 day cycle. But actually, even if you had a 28 day cycle, it's not guaranteed that you would ovulate on day 14. I know some people have been informed from a medical professional that they will ovulate 14 days after their period starts. And other people have been told that they will ovulate 14 days before their period starts. None of which is a guarantee, none of which is true for all. I have worked with some clients over the years where the only issue in their fertility journey was that they weren't completely sure when they were ovulating. Often it's that they were ovulating a lot later than they thought. So it was when working together quite a quick win for many. And sometimes it can be as simple as that, but we know it's not, we know, as I've said many times that there are many, many factors involved. And we also know that we are not looking for further information when we're going through the doctors necessarily. OVULATION SIGNS So do you know your signs of ovulation? Now, this is something I discussed earlier in the podcast in episode six. So that's worth the listen, if you haven't already listened to that one where I talk about ovulation signs. So naturally, when you ovulate, think about us as animals, not as logical overthinking at times, humans, but as animals, your body tells you it's time to reproduce. So your libido will be increased and you will have changing cervical mucus that will change over this fertility window. The type of mucus varies as we get nearer to ovulation, it's very choosy early on as to which sperm it let through. And the nearer to ovulation, as I've talked about in the episode six, it's going to let anything through at this point. So it is important to know what that mucus means and what it demonstrates. STRESS AND OVULATION We know that stress, anxiety, worry, fear affects ovulation. It's a very natural process in the body. It's a fantastic process to keep you safe because ultimately the first job of your body is for you to stay alive. It's second job is for you to have sustenance for you to continue. So to stay alive in the moment of danger and then to stay healthy and alive. And it's third job, and this is a hierarchy is procreation. So unless those other two are in place, as I've talked about before, procreation is going to come very, very low down on the list. So at times when your body feels you are in imminent danger in the past, this would be with predators. And I talk about tigers a lot, and Tiger Taming is something I work with my clients. It's a way to address this stress, worry, anxiety, and fear, and bring your body back into balance and help your fertility. So, when you are faced with a tiger, then your body, your hypothalamus, pituitary, adrenal access is working to ensure that everything is put into staying alive. And when everything is put into staying alive, then other aspects are switched down or switched off and ovulation can be one of these. Okay? So it could be that ovulation comes later, or it could be that you don't ovulate at all, as well as that, what we also know is not only can, and I hate using the word stress, but, but when your emotional health is, is, is unbalanced. When there is fear and worry and anxiety in place, it will affect ovulation, but equally ovulation can in fact be the cause of the stress, the worry and the fear. So it's in effect of, um, working with this to try and get the balance. Now, as you know, I hope you know that I will never tell you to just relax. Relaxing can be really, really difficult. So, when we look at your tigers, and again, I've talked about this many times before, but I'm going to talk specifically about your ovulation tigers and your tigers are your thoughts, your fears, and your worries. So what are the thoughts that are running through your head around the time of ovulation? What are those thoughts? What, what ifs do you have? What if I'm not ovulating? What if I don't get pregnant this month? I may never get pregnant. How do I know that this is the right time? How do I know that I'm ovulating? What if it's me? What if your partner isn't going to be around during the magic window and WHAT IS YOUR MAGIC WINDOW? What is the time you have put aside, or you have in your mind that is your magic window. And I hope your answer will be the period of seven days before ovulation. So that's what I work with, with my clients. And we look at that in different stages in order to maximize your chances of getting pregnant, because remember the egg lives for up to 24 hours. The sperm lives for three to five days can be up to seven. And I've repeated this time and time again. I know, but if you think about that, the design of the body is that the sperm needs to be there, ready. It needs to be there ready and waiting for when that egg is released. If you wait for ovulation, you may well miss. Also, if this is the first time you've had sex in a while at ovulation, you could be some quite dodgy sperm. That's not a medical term, but you know what I mean. There could be some dodgy sperm in that ejaculate at that point, the other thing is, what are you doing to analyze when you are ovulating? Are you using your body signs? Have you used ovulation predictor sticks before, or perhaps temperature charting?. And if you know that you're very regular and you know, when you ovulate, are you still peeing on ovation sticks around this time? Or do you have irregular periods now, or maybe even you have absent periods? I have clients who have a cycle every 28 days who aren't ovulating. So you can have anovulatory cycles and there are many things that cause this, that we can look into that we can start to learn more about. But if you are peeing on ovulation sticks every month, this in itself can cause a stress. This in a sense can cause that anxiety and switch down those natural signs of ovulation and maybe even be switching down ovulation itself, also ovulation predictor sticks. aren't always accurate. So if you have polycystic ovary syndrome, particularly you will have quite regular hormone surges potentially that don't lead to ovulation. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO? What can you do to support yourself at this time to know more about ovulation and to get in a better head space for it? So rather than reading everything and sending yourself crazy with your Google searches, I would suggest that you choose some, just a few sites that you find useful to support your fertility journey. You could work with somebody like myself to support you. Of course, when you are looking on the internet, when you are looking at social media, and I've mentioned this phrase before, don't just look at what Jane did, because the factors affecting Jane might be very different to the factors affecting you and also going to be a bit controversial, but this is my message, don't just believe what your doctor is telling you. I'm sorry, but your family doctor is not a fertility expert. And when you go to the fertility clinic, what you are really looking at there are assisted methods of conception. So if you really want to get a handle on ovulation, then it's important that you truly know and understand what is going on personally for you with ovulation, that you understand your body's signs. Now I've talked about ovulation pain before in an episode, ovulation pain is not a positive sign, always of ovulation. So don't think, oh, I get pain. So that's really good. So I know when I ovulate, we need to look a little bit further into that, especially. So when you understand your body and know the signs, you can develop a sense of trust in your body. And when you have a sense of trust that can in effect, start, start to support the reduction of the fear and the worry and anxiety, and the more understanding, and the more sound information with an action plan that you have, the more in control you can feel because let's face it. We don't feel in control of this at all. You can of course use ovulation predictor kits, but it's important to know when to use them. And it's important to identify what stress they in themselves are causing for you. So when I'm working with clients, we monitor the cycle. And I say, we, because I ask my clients to gather the data and I analyze the data because looking at that data and trying to analyze what it means can send you into anxiety, worry, stress, and fear. So whether you are doing your basal body temperature, and it's important to know the right way to do it, first thing in the morning, as soon as you wake, before you do anything else at all. And I encourage my clients to chart this on an app called fertility friend, it can be a bit overwhelming for you as an individual, but it gives me an incredible amount of detail about all parts of the cycle, not just ovation. We can see slow rises in ovulation. We can see a strength of ovulation and that's really, really key as well. And also the magical Luteal phase. If you are using a fertility analyzer, such as MIRA then you can see there, your estrogen and your lutenizing hormone to give you that picture of ovulation, but what you can also do now with their additional wands that they have is that you can measure the progesterone as well. And that's really, really powerful. And don't forget that progesterone production starts after you ovulate. So if you've had a blood test to look at your progesterone and the progesterone is low, if it's super low, that might mean you're not ovulating, or if it's low, it might mean that the ovulation isn't very strong. So there's lots that progesterone can tell us as well. It's also really, really important to look at the wider aspects affecting fertility. Remember your egg is a cell. So your cellular health is really key when it comes to nutrition and also oxidative stress can have an effect on your cellular health oxidative stress that is in the body as a result of emotional stress, as well as physical stress on the body. So it's key to look at some key deficiencies that might be affecting your cellular health as well. And of course the pelvic health itself. So is there sufficient space in your pelvis in episode nine, I chatted with Claire Mockridge about, does your womb have enough room? You know, is it trying to do its job from behind a wardrobe in effect? So what is the pelvic space like? What's been affecting that particular area. What might be impacting ovulation? Have your reproductive organs got enough room in there? Is it been affected by endometriosis or possibly any adhesions or scarring? And also if you've had a previous child and you're trying to get pregnant again, there might be effects from your previous pregnancy and birth that could be having an impact as well. And we also know that ovulation and when you ovulate changes, it's not always the same as it was. It does change throughout your life cycle So there is potentially a lot, you don't know, but there is a lot you can know. So if you want to get more answers, if you want to get the answers or even find the right questions, so you can get the answers, then I can help with that. So if that's something you want to reach out, get in touch, can get me on socials at fertility, rewire or kat@fertilityrewire.com or book an insight call. I hope that there is sufficient information here in this podcast. And in the podcast episodes, I've mentioned episode six and episode nine, that might give you more information and might arm you with the information to get the answers that you need, and to be able to interpret those answers as well. If you haven't heard already. I have a group program: as well as working one to one with anybody experiencing fertility issues. I have a group program that where I'm working with people who are trying to get pregnant again. So trying to extend their family and the specifics involved in that. And then also, just before I go, if you have these tigers that need taming, if you have an ovation tiger, a timing tiger, a getting pregnant tiger, a worry, you know, these tigers that are there. I do have a tiger Taming program, which is a four week online program. and if you want more information about that, then again, reach out and I’ll point you in the right direction
I ask you to imagine you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself at the point you decided to try to start or extend your family. What would have been useful and what do you wish you had been told. I also go into detail about what you should have been told and how my dream is that anyone who is thinking of starting or extending a family should be informed abut. In ancient times the elder women of the village would share key information, would have cultures in place including foods believed to support fertility. All of which has been lost to a medical model that provides no support until you are 6 months to a year down the line. Even at that point there is no real support or advice just interventions. Transcript Welcome to this episode of the fertility rewire podcast. And in this episode, I'm going talk about, well ask you really, what did you need to know really before you even started trying to conceive? When you first thought about starting a family, what did you really need to know then? And if you could travel back in time to when you first decided you wanted to start a family or to get pregnant this time, if you're looking at extending your family, what would you say to your former self, from what you've learned so far on this journey, what would that be? Are there certain actions you would've taken sooner? Would you have stood up to the medical staff sooner than perhaps you have, or, or perhaps you haven't? My dream is that anyone who is thinking about getting pregnant, whether their first or the next time, that they would get access to this information straight away, that you don't have to wait the six months, or one year before anything is even looked at, and then you get no answers. That you would be given access to testing and that you would have a pre trying checkup. A preconception checkup, a preconception MOT, if you like now, you can't have access to that, unless that is something that potentially you are paying for. And even then it doesn't necessarily fit into the medical health models, but you can do home testing. You can seek therapists or consultants in different areas that do testing. If you're going to do home testing and I talked last week about the stress of ovulation. So I do want to bear in mind about this potential stress that can be caused by the home testing too, because you do need someone to interpret it potentially because even with the home tests, the normal is not what we consider optimal actually for fertility. So you've heard me talk about the MIRA home testing, and to use their Max ones, where you're looking at the progesterone as well. You can use the code FERTILITYREWIRE at checkout to access a discount on the MIRA Website https://gbp.miracare.com/products You can do basal body temperature yourself. So you've got an idea of what's happening in your cycle and you can use something like Ovusense, which can take the stress away from having to wake up and, and take that. If you are looking at male fertility factors and I do urge you to, from the very, very start, because all too often, I see clients where, you know, as a female you are looking at what it is wrong with you, you and generally the medical profession seems to go down that line a little bit as well. But even though you'll only get basic sperm test results from a home test, I do think it's worthwhile still looking at that. And you can use a company called ExSeed and there are others available, of course, but this is one that, that I've come across recently. You can use code FERTILITYREWIRE to get a 15% discount. And I'm hoping to do an interview actually with somebody from ExSeed soon so we can explain a little bit more about that. So you're looking at basic information for sure and what I would say in any home tests, if it's coming up as suboptimal or even outside of normal ranges, I would still urge you to take advice from elsewhere and get this looked at in more detail. Definitely. So when we're looking at home testing, you can test your hormone levels. You can test your follicle stimulating hormone now in home tests, you can test your progesterone also. You can test your estrogen and this can be in urine, or this can be with a blood test. Remember a blood test is a snapshot of that day, a urine test, you're generally looking at more regular frequency of that. So that can give you a bigger picture with those and the fluctuations, especially when it comes to progesterone. You can do home tests for thyroid and increasingly a wider panel of thyroid, and also to look for thyroid antibodies, which I've seen in quite a few clients recently. And then we have our autoimmune factors that are coming in there. So even though you wouldn't necessarily be medicated for your thyroid, you can look to natural ways to support your thyroid and to boost it because we know that an underactive thyroid, or let's not say underactive, because then we're in normal and abnormal ranges again, aren't we? A suboptimal thyroid, a thyroid that isn't functioning as you would want it to function is something that needs supporting. Vitamin D is a huge, huge factor when it comes to fertility. So that's the test you can be looking at as well. Now, how can you get these tests? Well, as I said with, you've got mirror for your, um, urine analysis of hormones. And I think I have mentioned before that you can get a discount with Mira. If you use the code fertility rewire or one word, you can look at temperature so you can look at Ovusense. You can also look at ExSeed for sperm tests here in the UK for blood tests, Medichecks is an example. There's lots of home testing, finger prick, testing services that you can use equally within Europe, the US and Australia as well. You will have your own home testing companies. You do, but I urge you to get those looked at now. That's something I do with my clients. There are other therapists that offer the similar services, but do get those looked at because of course you can just become hugely stressed by the test themselves because you haven't necessarily got that feedback from someone or to know your next steps or your proactive next steps also to give yourself some preparation. So, for some people maybe don't do tests, but just assume that there could be an issue, not in a worrying sense, not in a, oh there's something terribly wrong sense, but just assume that there could be an issue. So what could you do to counter that? So can you look at your hormonal balance? Can you see what your cycle is telling you? Remember the bleed can tell us so much about our balance of hormones, the length of your cycle, when you ovulate within the cycle, how long that follicular phase is, how long that luteal phase is, can tell us so, so, so much, but having that interpretation and I urge you not to do that in forums because when you are in a forum often, not all the time, but often you are looking at opinion of others, we're back to “what Jane did”. Whereas you want to be speaking to someone who can actually guide you and interpret these for you, and maybe even point you onto somebody else that can test at a further or deeper level or additional support that you might need. So you need to know about that hormonal balance through the whole cycle. You need to know what your period is telling you, what your strength of ovulation is and what your ovulation signs are. Also consider your own pelvic health. Now, I alluded to this again last week, when we think about pelvic congestion, any previous surgeries, if you've had a child already, if you're trying for your next child, then were there situations possibly at the birth, did you have a cesarean section? Are there impacts there physiologically that we can look at and also taking proactive steps to improve your pelvic health? There is lot you can do about that. What's your emotional level like? Where are you at with things? Are you stressed anyway, do you experience anxiety and worry? Is there a lot going in your life that could be causing your stress hormones to be switching off or down your reproductive function? Are you feeling safe? You know, and I, I don't mean that in a sense of imminent danger, but I refer to that in that, you know, design of our bodies of our brains to keep us safe about the adrenaline, about the fight or flight reaction, where is your level of worry? And increasingly when we like to have control, we can find that when we're into something like trying to get pregnant, where we seem to have no control, that can really spin us out emotionally, particularly people who are demonstrating levels of a high functioning anxiety. So often you're in a high achieving position you've always achieved. Well, you are organized, lots of very positive factors around this, but the, the downside is that you've got that constant ‘what if’ chatter going on in your brain and you might tend to catastrophize and struggle with that feeling of not being in control. And that's something I'm seeing quite a lot with clients that I'm working with at the moment also consider your cellular health. So we can look at optimizing nutrition, of course, but let's specifically as well look at that cellular health because the egg is a cell and the sperm is a cell. So that's really, really important and something that you need to add to your toolkit in terms of preparation. So we are preparing our minds and our bodies to be at that optimal level for conception and the biggest thing… And I have, I've already said this in this podcast and I, I drone on about it constantly perhaps, but do not accept normal. We want optimal, don't think about normal as being okay. And also if we can shift our focus perhaps to not to getting pregnant, but to actually having a healthy baby. And I know that can be difficult in terms of getting ahead of ourselves, but it is our ultimate aim. So it is good to see that as the top aim when we're trying to get pregnant. So I'm wondering, did you undertake any of this when you first stepped out on your journey and chances are you wouldn't because why would you? It's not something we're educated about. And even when you started to experience difficulties and you've gone to the doctors and you've had tests, these tests have never been suggested maybe the, the hormone profile, but not over a longer period of time. For sure. When you think back to ancient times, when we had more of a sense of tribe and more of a sense of community there would've been elders, you know, the wise women in the community who would've educated about fertility, you know, couples who were going to get married or were just married, were given lots of information. And there's lots of cultural diets and specific foods that would be used to enhance and encourage fertility. And there would be that preparation, that sense of preparation and education, which fertility now falls into a medical model of trying to step in when something's wrong and bypass, we’re losing that. We're certainly losing that sense of education. And in schools I've talked about before, we're not being educated about what could be an issue when it comes to getting pregnant. You know, we're told it's really easy to get pregnant, and it would be the worst thing that could possibly happen to you. We're not taught about fertility and equally, we're not taught about it in a sense that we might be able to show some understanding and empathy to those that are experiencing fertility difficulties. You know, that saying to anybody, oh, when are you having children next? You know, when they, they haven't had children in your timeframe that you're expecting or, or making assumptions, or as I mentioned before about offering platitudes, when people have miscarriage or loss, and that's something that needs to be educated about so that we have not only a wider understanding of what may potentially happen to us as individuals in the future, but also to have that understanding of what could be going on for other people, we need to be managing diagnosis of polycystic ovary syndrome and endometriosis better. We need to, you know, not be telling girls and young women when they're diagnosed that we can manage this for now, but they'll have trouble getting pregnant because that's set in an emotional barrier and block already, um, which doesn't serve to support the condition itself. And we need to see P C O S and endometriosis as symptoms. And we need to be doubling back further to look for the root cause. So is any of this resonating with you? if you think, gosh, you know, this would've been useful to be told earlier on in the journey, what would that have changed for you? And it doesn't mean that you can't have that education now, if you haven't already received it. But the medical model needs to change. There needs to be a fertility health check. It could save millions of pounds in IVF, and it could be offering IVF absolutely where it's needed. Because as I've said before, I'm not against IVF. Sometimes that is the option that, you know, clients I'm working with go with. And I support them absolutely through that, but it shouldn't be a first line treatment. It shouldn't be the first thing that's offered in terms of fertility, we should be taking a step back and actually giving this information and this education sooner. So if you haven't already looked at the things that I've suggested, if you haven't had that fuller assessment to be that fertility detective yourself, and be supported on this journey, it might be time to reach out, to look at reputable sources of information, to have someone by your side, to support you on this fertility journey, to teach you or to tell you the right questions you need to ask to get the right answers that can then lead you to the correct proactive steps you need to take. And there are many people out there in the fertility community who can help you with this. It might be that IVF is your preferred option, that it is the right option for you. I'm not the only person who supports people in fertility. Of course you can reach out to whoever speaks to you, speaks to your heart and is answering your questions about fertility. But if you did want to talk to me about it, then you can reach out to me on socials at fertility rewire, or you could drop me an email, at Kat@fertilityrewire.com, book a call with me. What I wanted to do in this episode is just to make you think, but hopefully wider. Think about not only what would've been helpful to you, and actually maybe if perhaps you haven't gone down those lines already, maybe it's time to look into those things. And I hope I've given you a steer on what you can do. If you want to know more about what tests you, you could do again, just drop me a line. Um, and we can chat about that. If you need more support emotionally, you know, be aware of that, be aware of your emotional health, where are you at now? What are those thoughts that go through your head and what effect do they have on you in your daily life? It's important, so important that we consider emotional health, not just before we start to try to conceive, but actually the effects of this fertility journey may have taken or are taking a huge toll on your emotional health. And if that's something that you need support with, then, you know, watch this space, I'm bringing an online resource to you soon, so if you're not on the mailing list, perhaps jump on that and you will hear about that. When I say soon, I'm recording this in July 2022, just for context. I just wanted to provoke some thought and to you to look back and maybe take a step and consider. Let's just start again. Let's really start fresh and see if we can get some answers, but I'm aware of the huge emotional toll potentially already on you. So it's important to get some support there. And if you're just starting out on your journey or, you know, anyone that's just starting out on your journey, then this is in on their journey. This is useful advice. I hope for you. So as ever take care until next time. If you wanted to chat then please book a call with me.
I'm often reminded of the Meatloaf song. I'll do anything for love, but I won't do that. Will we do anything in blind faith and is that wise? What's actually needed is more thorough education of what we can do. And the first step is becoming your own fertility detective, in a controlled and structured way, often with support to interpret your findings. So what can you look into, well if you've heard me talk before, first off luteal phase and sperm, follicular phase, strength of ovulation and lets focus in on egg and sperm health and pelvic health.. I discuss ways to monitor progesterone and share some discount codes (FERTILITYREWIRE) for MIRA fertility Analyzer and Medichecks home testing https://medichecks.com/
Do you feel you should be happy? Or are you made to feel that by society or specifically the fertility space on special media? I have had a few clients whose Dr has actually suggested that they should be happy with one. But having another child has such a huge emotional difference doesn’t it? It's not about having a child, it's about having a sibling, and guilt can be an overriding emotion in this and lack of community and support. I’m excited to share that I am launching a group programme for people trying to extend their families and I’m running a Beat version, which means that you can join at a hugely discounted price as I will develop it further based on your feedback. Drop me a line at kat@fertilityrewire.com with which I'm in and I’ll send you more details, or head over to the website and pick up some free resources and join the mailing list.
------------------------- -------------------------
When it comes to not getting pregnant, we want to know why, we want to know the cause. Even if you are given a cause, its important to know that it may not be the only factor affecting things. A blocked fallopian tube or tubes of course is a huge factor in preventing pregnancy but bypassing tis with IVF will not guarantee success because they may indeed be more than 1 thing, there could be multiple factors affecting fertility. 2 partners each with a number of things affecting perhaps. In this episode I encourage you to revisit your tests, as I discussed last week in episode 51, and also to try as best you can to step out of what is wrong, and step into what can I do to fully optimise our fertility. I accept that for many who have tried everything that this could be triggering, and I invite you to ot lose sight of the emotional impact and the clever design of our bodies to keep us safe and that when unsafe, our body is not putting conceiving at the top of its agenda, in fact it can stop it. If you want to know more about your results and how I can specifically help you, why not get in touch and book a free clarity call. Want to watch me and listen? check out the episode on you tube Want to be the first to hear about episode releases, behind the scenes news, updates and offers? Our mailing list is the place to be for that. For free resources, visit our webpage
I discuss why your fertility tests may not be ‘normal’ after all. Have you been told that your results are ‘normal’? That there is nothing to be done? That your fertility issues are unexplained? What we have to realise first of all is that our medical model deals with ill health, that test results outside of the wide range represent ill health, but that those within it do not necessarily represent healthy. When trying to conceive you want to be at your healthiest surely? In this episode I discuss Thyroid Stimulating hormone and Ferritin specifically. I look at how the levels accepted for your thyroid in the first trimester of pregnancy are significantly lower than those accepted when trying to conceive and how considering these 2 states merge, how can that be? I urge you to get a copy of your results and look where you are in the range. If you want to know more about your results and how I can specifically help you, why not get in touch and book a free clarity call. Want to watch me and listen? check out the episode on you tube Want to be the first to hear about episode releases, behind the scenes news, updates and offers? Our mailing list is the place to be for that. For free resources, visit our webpage
In this episode I chatted with Professor Geeta Nargund, an inspiring woman putting women first Medical Director at Creative Fertility about Natural and Mild IVF and getting the same success as conventional IVF with reduced treatment Burden, reduced complications and improved outcomes for babies. Before I started chatting with her, I wanted to let her know that I've been interested in what Create Fertility has been doing for a long time. It makes such a lot of sense to work with the body, to give a little nudge rather than the pressure physically and emotionally of the numbers game in IVF. You may not know about Mild/Natural IVF, along with so much so many don’t know about fertility generally. Mild/Natural IVF produces the SAME success rates as conventional IVF, while reducing the treatment burden, side effect, complications, injections and costs. So its a win win and hard to understand why its not the norm in more clinics. We chatted about the benefits, research based evidence and this may open more opportunity for fertility for so many listeners. Professor Narunds passion for women’s choices, rights and the desire to gain gender equality in fertility treatments is clear and inspiring. Ensuring the safety and welfare of the women is as important as success with informed choice, which as you may know is a key part of what i speak about. If you want any more information, see where you’re at or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange Free call Free resources are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails . Click here more information about the group programme ‘Conceivable’
In this episode I talk about the 2 week wait, which is generally the wait from ovulation to the end of your cycle or from embryo transfer to when you can do a pregnancy test. But before I even get into the general advice for how you can survive this I acknowledge the fact that you are pretty much waiting throughout your whole cycle, so 2 weeks is in itself a misnomer. In fact when you add up how long you've been trying, the wait so far could be months or years I also discuss how the 2 week wait after ovulation may not actually be 2 weeks and that this information can give us so many clues and answers about how your cycle is affecting your fertility. Before recording this episode, I googled surviving the 2 week wait and I look into the common advice found across various sites and how this may not work for you, why not and how I help my clients through it. Why you can't Just **@! relax, and how can you not obsess about symptoms, how its not so easy to talk to someone when you haven't really told anyone what you're going through I really hope you enjoy the episode and I ask you to share with me how you survive the 2 week wait, or what unhelpful advice you've been given. Drop me a comment on your platform you're using to listen or email me kat@fertilityrewire.com For free resources or to find out more about how you can work with me visit https://fertilityrewire
Well, hello, it's been a while hasn't hit? For those of you that have listened to this podcast from the very beginning, it's been quite a gap. I'm sure for those of us that have caught up later. It may still be a gap and for that, I apologise. What happened was I decided to take a break between season one and season two and that break was going to be about a month or maybe two months. That was April 2021. It was also around tht time that the UK was to some extent re opening. I was able to open my clinic doors and see my clients on a face to face, increase my online clients as house became empty at times again. I always had the intention of starting up again but in terms and work life balance, something had to give and it was, I'm afraid the podcast. I've had lots of lovely messages from people asking where I am and if I'm okay and if I'm still working and yes, I am. I had just taken on a little bit too much. But I'm back and I'm very excited. I've got great plans for lots of new episodes. So I hope you'll stay with me. So in this episode, what I thought I'd do is catch you up on what's been happening with clients and a couple of case studies. As I'm sure you're aware, I say it's a game of two halves. Fertility issues are 50% female and 50% Male, I know the burden is generally on the females but I had two clients that started seeing me around the same time and both had come and said that there was reasons they weren't getting pregnant. One had irregular periods, with physical and emotional symptoms pre menstrually. One had a diagnosis of endometriosis. What I did with both of these clients, as I always do, is in order to get the full picture, took a full history and lifestyle of both partners and suggested that they got a sperm analysis for both male partners, which they did. Within about a week of each other these tests came back and they were incredibly similar. If you've listened to the podcast, you'll perhaps of heard me share that the WHO ( World World Health Organisation) guidelines for sperm analysis is that anything at or above 15 million is considered fertile. Anything below is considered to have some fertility issue. You'll also know from listening to me that I think we should be going well above that. If you listened to Dr Sheryl Homa speak on the podcast you'll have heard her say that 15 million is not really optimal. So,, both of them had sperm results that 0.03 million, significantly lower. We discussed lifestyle factors and changes including antioxidants, we looked at supplementation, specific fertility supplementation and reducing inflammation but also his partner told me that he had really hot baths, which he had mentioned at fertility consultations. And had been told that it wouldn't explain this this very, very low result. And the only option was ICSI. So we worked together and I said just for three months lets drop the hot baths. While taking the supplement he stopped them, but what proved difficult was the opinion of family and friends things like your 'dad had hot baths and we had you, We've always had hot baths and it's not an issue for us. Getting together with friends and going to a spa he didn't get in the hot tub, but friends said, it'll be OK. So it brings to light this aspect doesn't it about people not being supportive of things both in the medical profession and also your social circle. But anyway, they stuck to this and he didn't have hot baths for three months and he stuck to his supplement regime. There was some hand reflexology moves that I'd provided by video in their coaching support, which were being regularly every month that he was doing, or his partner was doing and after three months he has his semen tested and it went from 0.03 million to 30 million, 30 million! From being told that he would have no chance of conceiving a child naturally, making these small lifestyle changes to having absolute optimal result. And that is just incredible. But it's not surprising, not surprising to me at all. Because I've told you before I've discussed it before that this male factor is grossly overlooked, and if we could just look into this a little bit more, if we could just pay a little bit more attention to the quality and the quantity of sperm, then we will be making incredible changes to Fertility. The second couple that I worked with, had the same result of 0.03 million, they had a child already. So something had happened. When we started to look into more detailed history, if you refer back to the Sheryl Homa episode where she spoke condition called a Varicocele, it was something that just struck in my mind when we had a chat because he was getting this kind of a ache that he'd had for a while and he just put it down to something else. He assumed that it might be related to his job or related to the fact that lifting weights and it was something that he put up with. To give you more background, the doctor in this case, I have to say , his bedside manner and communication skills were horrendous. I think he said something along the lines of well you're never going to happen with a child with a result like that. And because they already had a child, the only option available was IVF, which would need to be self funded . Many questions arose such as, Would that be possible financially? Would it work? Anyway, as well as similar supplementation and hand reflexology input, I encouraged him to request or ultrasound of the testes. If it was just about fertility I'm sure the answer would have been no, but because he had a symptom, because he had this is kind of low level ache he pushed and he pushed and he pushed and he got an ultrasound. He also came to see me because he was a face to face client for a reflexology treatment and the reflex area that represents the testes on the side with the pain did feel different and now we don't diagnose with reflexology, but it did have some characteristics that had alerted me . So he had the ultrasound and yes, he had a Varicocele and he's pushed and pushed for the surgery and he has had it. When they went to do the surgery, to remind a Varicocele is a varicose vein that is supplying the testes. If you think about the heat that is generated there is going to pretty much kill the sperm, but also the blood supply is affected as well. It's not getting through this vein that was completely blocked when they did the surgery and they've had to put six stents into it. Now, we don't know what effect that's going to have. We certainly hope that the pain is going to go away. It also, as many of you, I'm sure are thinking actually provided a potential answer to the years and of trying for a second child unsuccessfully. So I think my point is that, as I've said many times and as I say to my clients, we can't just accept that this is unexplained. Or we can't just accept that if you've got a low sperm count the only option is ICSI. There is a lot that can be done to improve sperm counts. There is a lot that can be done to improve sperm quality. And again, not necessarily with everybody but unless we try unless we look into this, unless we are prepared to be that detective to look to travel upstream and get the answers we won’t get answers. It just made me reflect on so many couples over the years, even before IVF came into the world that haven't become parents and I am so incredibly passionate about this. Fertility really has to be investigated further. As a woman, you have your hormonal levels checked. You have ultrasound of uterus, and you have the potency of the fallopian tubes tested, as a man a very basic semen analysis which tells us little, purely for signposting to fertility Treatment. I've said that before and Dr Sheryl Homa said the same. It is not about identifying a cause of your fertility issues, It's about identifying which fertility treatment is going to be better. Interestingly, IVF was developed for women with missing or damaged fallopian tubes initially, a way to bypass that and now it is used much much more readily. Again, I'm not anti IVF , I’m very pro it when it's needed. I just feel we can investigate this a little bit further and also if you are having IVF taking steps that actually improve the quality of the sperm is going to be hugely beneficial. So the sperm count is an example that I've talked about but it goes a lot further. Remember I've said things will remain unexplained If we're not looking in the right places, and if we're looking in the right places, we might just be able to get an explanation. So I wanted to just bring that to your attention in this first episode in the second season. I've got exciting plans ahead, we have an interview that I've done already, that we're just editing at the moment, but I wanted to let you know that the podcast is back. I work with people one to one face to face in Nottingham or online all over the world, One to one is not always the right option for everyone whether that's a financial option or not, but what I am working on right developing a group programme. In it you will be able to access me and to the coaching material on a group level and al have people with you in that group. Now you can get as involved in that group as suits you and discussions and support as you want. But that is something that's coming so I will open a waiting list for that and if its something that you are interested in you will be able to find details of that on the website. If you want to get in touch you can get in touch with me at Kat at fertility rewired.com. The podcast is also on YouTube. And you can access that you can subscribe to the channel fertility rewire where you can have you can pop comments in there to me directly. You can contact me by email kat@fertilityrewire.com or you could find me on social media which I've been not been very present again, but will be popping in. Well thanks for your patience. I'm excited to bring more information to you in the future. Take care now. Relevant podcast links Dr Sheryl Homa https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/male-fertility-factors-with-prof-sheryl-homa/ Sperm - more than just a number https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/sperm-just-a-number/ Male factors in fertility https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/14-2/ https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/14-2/
How fantastic would it be to be able to run laboratory tests to identify your hormone levels and give you accurate data on when you are ovulating? In the US, more testing and more often is available, here in the UK, not so much, and certainly not after initial investigations. Well you can, Sylvia Kang, CEO and co founder of the Mira Fertility tracker explains in this episode how Mira can support you. This marvellous hand held device is basically working to the same technology as laboratory equipment, but shrunk down to the fir on the palm of your hand. I’ve been working with data from clients who are using the Mira App for some time now and I have been incredibly impressed. Analysing a urine sample shows the Oestrogen and lutenizing hormone and develops a bespoke picture for an individual. I’ve seen great insights in clients with PCOs specifically. As with this condition there may appear to be a number of ‘attempts’ before ovulation actually takes place. Sylvia ran me through her background, which is impressive and why she was driven to develop Mira. Mira as it stands is an exciting piece of equipment but there is more excitement to come with the inclusion of progesterone testing included. This will be incredible for all users but for those with PCOS it will give a definitive indication that ovulation occurred. For many in my client base this will support those who have a lower progesterone, and also will show us the affects our work is having on raising this, which is a huge part of the work with many clients at the moment. An what’s more the ability to test Beta HCG, the pregnancy hormone is also coming I’ll let Sylvia explain it to you. If want to follow Mira on Instagram you can do so @mirafertility They have a you tube channel with some great webinars, one from myself on reducing stress when ttc. If you want to get the Mira starter kit, head over to https://www.miracare.com/mira-shop/fertility-plus-starter-kit/ and use the code FERTILITY REWIRE to get a $25/£25 discount, and what’s more as a Mira user you get a 20% discount off my services. If you want any more information, see where you’re at or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange Free call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails .
What is ovulation pain telling you? You may have been told or read that Ovulation pain or mittelschmerz (German for Middle Pain) is normal, maybe even that it is a good sign for fertility. But actually it can be far from that. It can in some case ne an indication of something that may actually be negatively affecting your fertility. It could be a mild cramp, a dull ache, stabbing or even debilitating pain, which may last seconds, minutes or hours. If you are waiting for ovulation pain as a sign of ovulation , when trying to conceive, ttc, you may of course be leaving it too late. The egg as we know lives for up to 24 hours and the sperm has to travel, so if waiting it could be too late. But when we look at the pain itself, this may be due to factors other than ovulation alone, such as cysts, endometriosis, bacterial infection and more, or it may as I have seen with many of my clients show us that it may in fact also be an indicator of pelvic congestion, and/or inflammation. When we work together one of our first progress indicators is the removal of ovulation pain and I talk about some such cases. Other relevant episodes Tuning into ovulation Pelvic congestion https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/9-2/ Endometriosis case study If you want any more information, see where you’re at or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange Free call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails .
The word should is one of the most powerful words we hear and what we say to ourselves. It can be a motivator but also a real barrier to change. When searching for what we should do, there is a risk of overwhelm, fear and also resentment. It's a word that can trigger deep held limiting beliefs, and can lead to a 'why should I?' The why "should I?" is so key in terms of our thoughts and emotions and can be one or many of your tigers. You've no doubt heard me talk about tigers before. In this episode I just start the discussion around this really and give you some steps to distance the emotion attached to should and guide you on the possibility of further work. I also share some exciting news regarding the digital packs for both the Fertility Rewire method and Tiger Taming. bTo be amongst the first to know when they are released, you can join the mailing list as thats where I'm announcing it first. Relevant episodes How stress affects your fertility- getting to know your tigers https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/3-2/ Overwhelm, the unexplained, thoughts and mindset https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/15-2/ Can you be in control when trying to get pregnant https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/23-2/ The emotional impact of trying to conceive This is Deeper than Sadness
It was an absolute pleasure to chat with Professor Sheryl Homa this week on the podcast. Sheryl Homa is an HCPC registered Clinical Scientist with a special interest in male fertility. She obtained her degrees in Biochemistry at Imperial College of Science and Technology and the Middlesex Hospital Medical School. She spent a large part of her career as an academic research scientist in the field of oocyte maturation, funded by the National Institutes of Health in the USA. For many years she served as Scientific Director of several fertility clinics in the UK working in both the public and private sectors. During this time, she became aware that male fertility is considerably marginalised and as a result, opened Andrology Solutions in 2007, the first and only HFEA licensed clinic of its kind, dedicated to male infertility. She has collaborated on many research projects and is the author of numerous scientific articles, abstracts and book chapters in the fertility field. Her studies include investigating calcium signaling in sperm and more recently, the role of oxidative stress and infection on sperm quality. Sheryl has been responsible for introducing and CE marking novel state of the art testing for male infertility, including a chemiluminescence assay for measuring seminal reactive oxygen species. Currently Sheryl is honorary Professor in Biosciences at University of Kent and consultant clinical lead for Andrology at The Doctors Laboratory. We chatted about how men are equally responsible for creating an embryo that would lead to a child, how half of the genetic material is from men and that the child is a reflection of the genetic material of both partners. That it isn't just about getting pregnant or staying pregnant but ultimately the health of a child. We talked about how sperm and eggs need to be as fit and healthy as they can be and how if the sperm or egg is damaged in anyway this passes to every cell of the child and this is an area that I talk about a lot with my clients: that we need to widen our vision looking further than just getting pregnant. This helps us make the changes necessary. Sheryl said something that really made sense to me and she said that she advises her male clients to act as though they are pregnant so in the few months leading up to conception to think about their sperm as that they are carrying pre babies. We know that 11 to 12 weeks is necessary for both the sperm and the egg to develop fully and so a preconception preparation plan is absolutely vital and she compared this to preparing for Wimbledon and saying that if you were going to compete at Wimbledon you wouldn't just rush on and play would you? No, you would prepare with training, health and with the right equipment. I’m a huge fan of an analogy myself, I’ve often used the example of how you wouldn’t ‘just run’ a marathon. We looked at how it's important to consider quality and not quantity and how this is important to maximise your chances of both natural and assisted fertility and we need the best quality egg and sperm. We talked about the sperm analysis and how this is a crucial first step and provides great information but it only tells you if there are potentially enough and we know the parameters are low, too low, and if sufficient are moving. However, it doesn't tell us whether the sperm is capable of getting to the egg or if it is capable of entering the egg or if it has the right triggers to ensure embryo development. Resistance infertility circles was something that we discussed as well and this letters onto the resistance amongst the fertility clinics to undertake two very specific tests that give it so much information about the sperm in terms of fertility but also importantly in terms of miscarriage and how this really should be offered to all couples experiencing recurrent miscarriage and those tests are the DNA fragmentation test and the oxidative stress test on the sperm. Something that comes up for me with my clients and with something that we discussed is how some Doctors and clinics will say that even if the test showed DNA fragmentation or oxidative stress there isn't anything that can be done about it, but Sheryl explained how there might be quite a bit you can do about it. We discussed also how a condition called Variocele maybe a huge factor in terms of sperm quality, how a full clinical history should be taken for male partners, how women have an ultrasound but that men aren’t examined at all. How underlying infections which are not looked at are an underlying cause of conception and potentially miscarriage as well and how a microbiology test on the sperm is a crucial test. Of course we discussed the recent documentary by Rhod Gilbert ‘stand up for infertility’ Which led us to chat about physical issues and emotional issues. Not only emotional issues in terms of how they may affect sperm physically but the lack of support for men who are going through a fertility journey. She mentioned a Facebook group the men's fertility support run by Gareth Down which I would urge you to point your male partners in the direction of We chatted about some basic general advice at the start of a couples fertility journey and we discussed as you've heard me talk about before why trying to conceive at or just before ovulation may in fact be too late and how important a regular ejaculate is because stored sperm is in effect rubbish sperm, and that again it's not just about numbers it's about freshness and quality She will also explained how we were missing a vital piece in the journey and that your GP referring you to the fertility clinic straight away which is ultimately for assisted fertility is like going to your doctor with heart palpitations and the doctor saying let's get you a heart transplant. She explains that IVF is circumvention, how it is not managing fertility and that after initial GP tests, further investigation should take place and treatments suggested to correct possible fertility factors. Further investigation can be undertaken by an Andrologist. Something of interest that was pointed out in Rhod Gilbert's documentary is that there are 8000 registered Gynaecologists in the UK and only 200 registered Andrologist. It is Gynaecologists with a specialism in Fertility that you are referred to at the Fertility clinic Considering an Andrologist looks at male fertility factors this clearly isn't representing half of the equation is it? She said something which I have been saying you will have heard me saying certainly my clients have heard me say but there is too much emphasis on pushing towards IVF when this may not be needed and if IVF is needed we should be paying more attention to improving the quality of the egg and the sperm . You can find Sheryl at Andrology Solutions If you want any more information, see where you’re at or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange Free call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails .
Going through Assisted Fertility, Egg Freezing, IUI, IVF/ICSI in itself is overwhelming. But trying to keep track of results, medications, progress comparison through repeated cycles and the information required for a second opinion or a clinic move can be overwhelming. Are you using spreadsheets, have piles of paper work, but would like to get a sense of greater control and understanding. This is how Ravid Israel felt. After a long fertility journey that involved diagnosis delays, numerous cycles, having to seek support from different Doctors clinics and countries she realised that there were 100's of apps for women trying to conceive (un assisted) but not for women going through treatments, and so Embie was conceived. I work with couples where I try to support them with this sense of having no control, compounded by the actual lack in the fertility journey itself, and I can really see the benefits of this app. I've been having a look around myself and can see the benefits for many. I think what really stood out for me was that ability to have the info to share, for clients to share with me and to share with medics and clinics. You know when you want to seek a second opinion, but you feel awkward asking your current clinic? well you wouldn't need to, because you have it hand. Increasingly clients are wanting second pinions but it's not easy do that without sufficient information, or feeling that it could cause issues. And of course I discuss male factors because as you know by now this is crucial, overlooked and completely misunderstood. So if you are undergoing any assisted fertility treatments, and you would like a place to store your information, and if it would help you, have access to support and a community of people going through similar, the Embie app may be worth a look. You can follow the Embie app and Ravid on instagram visit the Embie app website here If you want any more information, see where you’re at or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange Free call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails .
When it comes to getting pregnant have you consider the uterine lining? The uterus is the nest for your developing baby, so it would make sense to consider it wouldn't it? It’s part of the monitoring process during IVF, so if you are trying to conceive by conventional, non-assisted methods it would make sense wouldn't it? But what should you consider? You will know if you have listened to me before that my views on testing are that you shouldn't have to wait so long, that the propose is misleading and actually it is to identify what assisted fertility method you require. So, the lining is only seen during you ultrasound, but realistically what is being looked at is the structure of the uterus. In this episode I discuss factors that are important to consider: __ __ I discuss factors that affect lining, especially when considering a thin lining, and also factors and reference to past clients with endometriosis and the effect of clearing old lining, in fact I talk about this clearing also in terms of the position of the uterus. Also think of what this part of your body is designed to do, what its role is in getting pregnant. We spend so long thinking about egg and sperm that we can lose sight of this nest. The place your embryo will nestle and develop. I give the analogy of a bird nest, and examples of ow I work with clients, both on a physical and emotional level. And this emotional level is something I am coming across extremely often. What are your feelings towards this area of your body, and I refer you to a blog post I wrote, called a letter from your womb. And when we start to look at how your womb itself may be viewing this situation right now, how it may feel, if that were possible. How you can start to work together as a team, developing and strengthening that connection. This is for many a surprising element of our free chat or deep dive call and action plan setting, but it's so incredibly important and is sadly overlooked. As it really doesn't matter how good a quality the basic ingredients are if you are planting the in un supportive environment. Mentioned podcasts and resources A letter from your womb Pelvic congestion https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/9-2/ Endometriosis: a case study Fertility massage Therapy
What you are feeling is real, it can be raw and yes it can be sadness but it can be something so much deeper and its OK that you feel like this. Whats not OK is that its not recognised enough. When you set out on this journey, the journey to parenthood, more often that not it starts with hope, excitement even, but over the time this changes, sometimes overtime, sometimes sooner and the emotions vary. Are you living life in 2 week blocks, or 2x 1 week block and a 2 week block, or other variations? when you get your period, do already know when 9 months ahead is? when you may ovulate, when your next period is due. is not getting pregnant taking over? Are you thinking about this most of the time? are you being triggered? the sight of a birth announcement, seeing prams, hearing people complain about their children? Not getting pregnant and the quest to become parents can be so much deeper than 'sadness' or 'disappointment'. Its important for you to recognise this, this is hard, this can seen unbearable and you don't have to struggle. That there is a wider view that you can take and get answers. I share some insights in this episode and I want you to know that I hear you, I know that as we run up to Christmas this is even harder,
The MIRA webinar "How to reduce TTC stress and boost Fertility" on December 2nd 2020, Registration link can be found by clicking here I work with those trying to conceive their first child and those wanting to extend their family and so in this episode I am discussing Secondary Fertility, or perhaps you have seen it as secondary infertility, thats my first reframe and creation right there! I often find that particularly within this group, couples are looking outside of what aer perhaps considered conventional or mainstream assisted fertility routes. One of the reasons for this is the financial implications and no access to funding. It is estimated that 1/4 of all couples seeking fertility treatments are already parents and that of all couples trying to get pregnant with their second child, only 1/2 actually seek fertility treatment. Should you be happy? This is something that I come across a lot, should you be happy? Are you asking for too much? some couples haven't conceived theoir first child. And this can affect them in terms of groups and forums, not wanting to speak up. It depends what side of the fence you are on. But a key issue here that affects getting pregnant with a second child, is that this isn't about having a baby, becoming parents, this is about providing a sibling your child. The emotional pull for that is something that you perhaps didn't expect the first time you got pregnant. In this episode I discuss the physical factors affecting getting pregnant again, of course some of the are absolutely what I see with this trying for their first child, but there are some subtle differences and commonalities amongst the secondary fertility group. I also delve a little further into the deeper emotional aspects, the sibling aspects and how your mind can take you into the future, so far in fact that you are no longer here. That you want to provide emotional support to your first child at this time with a sibling, that something might be missing. If you want any more information, see where you’re at or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange Free call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails . The private facebook group is open for join requests too.
At the start of this episode I let you know about the free reset and balance your hormones event running 16th-19th November 2020 You'll know if you've listened to me before that I have strong view on the reasons why many couples are not getting pregnant, and stronger views on the fact that they are not being informed and educated sufficiently before heading down the assisted fertility route, as a first line. So in this episode I share some of the reasons why couples are not getting pregnant and that if more couples were supported and educated earlier, the need for IVF as a first line would lessen. And in doing so the opportunities for more couples for whom it absolutely is their only options can access funded IVF in the UK, and other countries that offer this. So I discuss __ __ If you would like to book a free call with me, you can access the diary here Fertility visualisation tracks Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/fertilityrewire/ Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/mindandbodyfertility Sign up for updates, news and offers
IVF practices and approaches differ around the world, increasingly as I work with clients from different parts of the globe, this is becoming more evident. It was a great pleasure to chat with Dr Shahin Ghadir, founding partner of Southern California Reproductive Center. Dr. Ghadir is double board-certified in Obstetrics and Gynecology and Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility. He is currently an assistant clinical professor * * * * Dr. Shahin Ghadir is a compassionate and caring physician who dedicates his career to helping people overcome their reproductive challenges and infertility issues to achieve their goals of having the family of their dreams, for both traditional families and the LGBTQ community. He is currently positioned as a top physician for egg freezing, sought out by women all over the world for his skill set in this highly coveted procedure. Dr Ghadir is native Angeleno, his clinic based in Beverly Hills. Dr. Ghadir is continuously voted as one of the “Top Doctors” in the USA by Los Angeles Magazine’s national poll and Super Doctors of Southern California. We chatted about the difference in funding between here and the USA, and during the course of the interview, I am yet again reminded that our approach to IVF in the UK, could be better, although acknowledging that this is hugely impacted by cost and funding. Dr Ghadir discussed the success rates at the Southern California Reproductive Center, Higher than the average in the US and much much much higher than those in the UK, for both pregnancy and live births, and the main reason for this her explained was.the use of Pre Implantation Genetic Testing (PIGT) of Embryos. We discussed egg quality, sperm quality and it was great to hear him acknowledge how lucky we are in London to have access to Dr Sheryl Homer, leading Androloigist and developer of the Sperm Comet Test, used (not widely enough in my opinion) to detect sperm DNA damage. I discussed this in more detail with Barbara Scott in episode 14 of the podcast. https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/14-2/ Others areas discussed were Surrogacy, which you may recall I discussed recently relating to Hawaii in Episode 35. We discussed what an incredible 'voice' Dustin Lance Black and Tom Daley have been regarding their surrogacy experience, and How Dr Ghadir worked with them. We discussed Egg Freezing, age at conception for both men and women, How he has helped single women and single men and LBGTQ and heterosexual couples become parents and his view on pre conceptual care. Dr Ghadir also has an undergraduate degree in psychology which I'm sure if you've listened to me before was great to hear and find out more about. He gave some examples of outcomes of treatment based on mindset. What was interesting is how many people travel from not just the USA but worldwide to access treatment with him, and based on the results, it's clear to understand why. If you want to find out more about Dr Ghadir, his work and what is happening at the SCRC you can follow him on instagram @drshahinghadir and the YouTube Channel Fertility Talk PIGT is not widely available in the UK, not unless there has been specific cause for its use and is available in only a few centres. The implications of DNA fragmentation is huge, over looked in my opinion in relation to fertility and miscarriage in terms of the education we receive in the UK. PIGT is not generally available and as ever it brings me back to the root cause and education about what steps we can take, especially with regard to male factors, which in some cases we can address. I'd love to hear your comments, and subjects you'd like to hear more about. If you are new to the podcast, HELLO, it's great to have you here, take a look around other episodes, and subscribe to be up to date on episode releases. If you want to keep up to date and on top of news, products and client updates, you can join the email list or follow me on instagram or facebook If you want to have a FREE chat with me, see where you are at with your fertility, get a steer about what more you can do whether trying to conceive naturally and via assisted methods, find out more about working with me, I'd love to hear from you.
Have you been told that your fertility issues are unexplained? And despite them being unexplained you can access Fertility Treatment? What does unexplained infertility actually mean? Does it mean there is nothing wrong? Well no it really means that based on the limited testing done and the low parameters of what is considered acceptable, there are no obvious indicators of poor or no ovulation, low sperm, and no structural issues in the reproductive organs. I was really surprised and pleased when a client of men attended Leeds Fertility and both herald her husbands Vitamin D was tested, and that they wouldn't start the IVF until their levels were within acceptable parameters. This isnt common across the clinics that many of my clients are attending for investigations or IVF. Key nutritional deficiencies have a huge impact on fertility and are really tested within the fertility medical model. Also if you have been given a diagnosis Endometriosis or PCOS, it is assumed that everything else is OK and it may not be. What if there is another issue, being put in the ';box' can mean we overlook other issues. I share my passion for the unexplained and talk through my MS diagnosis and why I am so passion about information and the avoidance of overwhelm. That a much wider approach needs to be take, and through relatively inexpensive testing when you compare it to IVF. But even that testing may not be necessary. That applying an informed sensible approach to look at the much wider aspects that affect fertility is key. And this is how I work in the fertility rewire programme. If you want to discuss this with me in a free call, I'd be really excited to hear from you. There is an explanation, we just have to know where to look. How to find me Instagram Website https://fertilityrewire.com Group " Its not you its your hormones" https://www.facebook.com/groups/647370309541411 ASSOCIATED EPISODES Vitamin D and Fertility https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/27-2/ How to improve Egg Quality Male factors in fertility https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/14-2/ Sperm: More than just a number Overwhelm and the unexplained https://fertilityrewire.com/podcast/15-2/ MENTIONS Dr Chatterjee https://drchatterjee.com
Have you heard of Fertility Massage? Ever wondered what it involved? or perhaps you are interested in becoming a therapist? Absolute pleasure to chat with Andrea Clarke on this episode about Fertility Massage/Womb Massage Therapy. We recorded the episode before the start of the COVID lockdown, and so are thoughts are initially about travel and warm destinations! We decided to hold off releasing the episode and as things started to re open we thought it would be a good time to release. I am as you may or not know a practitioner myself and I incorporate this in my coaching programme, with clients self massaging or their partners massaging. We chat about the therapy, the mind body and spiritual aspects and how you can access a practitioner as well as training to be a therapist. Fertility Massage Therapy is so much more than a massage, yes fascia and tissue is affected by the massage, but there is a deeper level of energy and connection to oneself that can be addressed. Working with the mind and body aspect, many things 'come up for clients' and this, certainly in my practice lends itself to working with the wider aspects of fertility, which is why many therapist have other fertility therapy aspects to their armoury. Andrea can be found at Root Medicine https://rootmedicine.co.uk and on social media on Instagram and Facebook https://www.facebook.com/rootmedicineuk/ For details of Fertility Massage Therapy Practitioners near you, check the practitioner page I really hope that you enjoy the episode and is you have any comments or questions, as ever do reach out... You can book a free Fertility clarity call with me here Join my email list and keep up to date with whats happening art Fertility Rewire
I'm chatting in todays episode with September Burton from The Hawaii Surrogacy Center. September used to be a surrogacy case manager and now works as a health coach for the centre. We know that there is IVF tourism, and it of course stands to Eason that people would travel for surrogacy. In the UK and Australia, Surrogacy can only be altruistic, so no commercial aspects related to it and her in the uk we have laws to ensure this. I was curious to learn more about surrogacy in the United States, and also the tourism aspect to it. But I was really interested to learn more about the physical and emotional preparation for intended parents and the surrogate and also specifically emotionally for the surrogates family. I'm increasingly (as you know) amazed at the continued lack of preparation for conception advice at the beginning of a couples fertility journey, and especially regrading IVF. In fact preparation is improving but not enough and not enough to hold IVF, which is the potential for a rant. So I really hope you enjoy the episode, we obviously touched the surface only, as this is a huge issue, legally and emotionally. To find out more about Hawaii Surrogacy, visit their website. To find out more about the nutrition course, visit here To find out more about surrogacy in the uk there is a lot of information and support available, and many results on a search. For information relating to the legal rights in the UK visit here If you want any more information, or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange a free Discovery call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails . The private facebook group is open for join requests too.
If you want any more information, or would like to find out how working with me on the Fertility Rewire Method may help you, then you can arrange a free Discovery call Free resources https://fertilityrewire.com/free-resources/ are available including what your bleed can tell you about your fertility and a free visualisation. If you want to keep up to date on information, news, client progress updates, offers and podcast episodes, the best way is to receive my emails . The private facebook group is open for join requests too. You know the song right? Well we are going to talk about sex, but baby sex. Not the act itself, as I'm sure you've got that covered, but the emotional side of things when it comes to trying to conceive. And no please be rest assured that I am. not suggesting that you 'just relax'. We start to unpick the instinctive animalistic nature of procreation, that the design is to be driven by desire and being in tune with our own cycle can help us get back to that. We know that the key part of getting pregnant is having sex, It’s not possible to talk about getting pregnant without talking about sex, but it has to be considered in a wider aspect than just getting the egg and sperm together. It is instinctive, animalistic, hormonally driven and this is key, the subtle interplays, switch downs, diversions of hormones impact you getting pregnant. There are a number of reasons that the hormones are affected sufficiently to affect libido, but I want to focus in this episode to look at how a sense of danger, and not in a risky sexy way, affects things, that the fear and anxiety may be in the actual sex itself. In particular, having sex at the right time, If you’ve listened to me before you know that I work around what is required for survival of any species, procreation being the last element and that it cannot happen if the other requirements aren’t in place, namely safety and sustenance it may be that the act of having sex itself is threatening your safety, sounds strange, but remember that the body senses danger by its response to threat That threat can be real or imagined, and when you are in danger, it’s not the time to be reproducing, when the danger passes, it is, but if you are in constant danger, it may never be the time to reproduce and your body will protect you I have an episode on tuning into ovulation, on the podcast, its episode 6, so if your new to listening to me, have a look at that, where I discuss the signs, emotions and feelings, and you are unlikely to easily connect to this intuitive sense if you are experiencing anxiety and fear. These signs are an interest in sex, in feeling more easily aroused, more riske dreams and here’s something else that’s hugely key, this is a time of the cycle on a energetic level where you are really creative, you’ll excel at creative tasks, if you think about it it’s the time for the ultimate creation itself. Natures in built design is to make you want to have sex, an instinctive primal desire to have sex. So, in order for a species to survive there has to be procreation, and this is supported by a system of attraction, desire, with hormones to support including oxytocin, endorphins I also have a previous podcast episode on orgasm, episode 25, and why I prescribe them and this is a key part too. Do you find that orgasm is less in baby sex? And also if you are just having sex around your fertile window when ‘trying’ you aren’t necessarily tuned in energetically to ovulation, because when you are, you will want to have sex, for sex itself, not to conceive. One of the side effect that my clients experience when working in the fertility rewire programme is positive effects on their relationship and sex life. A client who is now pregnant told me that one of the things she found while working with me was that she felt the relationship with her partner became richer. What might sound strange is that in effect we put getting pregnant on the back burner, initially and with it the pressure, the fear, the anxiety ad a whole heap of emotions Another Client recently said that her and partner didn’t really ‘want’ to have sex, it was a sense of needing to, and scheduling. They are trying for a second child, and within this scenario sex and scheduling can be an issue any way. But in moving back into desire, she reported that they had been having amazing sex recently. Moving away from having to is a key part, moving into desire and wanting to, that animalistic nature if you like is key and there are lots of factors that affect this If you think back to a time when you were having sex with your partner, before trying to get pregnant, if you have a child already, before kids. Its different, the time of day, the desrie, it not being planned. So in the rewire programme, we look at this, but what's interesting is that when we support the body from the safety aspect, ( taming tigers), we can name the 'baby sex tiger', the 'ovulation tiger', the 'legs in the air after sex tiger'. Whats going through your mind at these times? When you consider accidental pregnancy, it's often heat of the moment, desire is high, absolute attraction, for this reason accidental pregnancies are common in affairs. I know people and perhaps you do too, who have had children through IVF, and often after long expensive journeys with many attempts and then not long after the birth of their baby or second baby, they are accidentally pregnant. They weren’t trying! And no, I am not telling you to relax, if only it were that easy. But a reduction in fear can improve things. I am not saying all you have to do is calm down, because we know that will cause stress about the stress which is worse that just the stress itself. You're looking for tigers everywhere at this point, your scared, it's hard to 'calm down' to 'just relax' at this point. I not talking about meditation, relaxing activities, although all incredibly useful in your self care practice, I'm talking about dealing with the actual tigers. Right there in that moment of stress, right in the moment when you are face to face with the tiger. It's been a huge part of my life and is at the heart of reducing that sense of danger in my programme. I work with people to start to reduce or remove the ‘tigers’ that cause the fear and anxiety, and sometimes these tigers are tamed through information, knowledge and support and sometimes the tigers need a little more work Just as some background, One of my qualifications is as a mindfulness based cognitive therapy teacher, I am qualified to run the 8 week MBCT course, and I have found some of the practices useful in my life and they have benefited my health, but I’ll be honest with you, I don’t have the time or inclination in my days to meditate for 20 minutes or more I really don’t! So the taming tigers element of my work doesn’t require that, you need to know what to do in the face of the tiger. This is the case for the large majority of my clients. When faced with the 'timing tiger', the 'will it work this month tiger' and the 'baby sex it self tiger' who may indeed all come as a pack, it may not be the best thing to meditate! You can build a level of safety and control which helps to tame the tigers too So we tame them, and then if one appears we develop skills to be safe, relaxation can help, but something at a deeper level, including regular practice, visualisation and a recognition of those tigers themselves. They are then less lilkely to jump out of a bush! The last place you want a tiger is when you are trying to make a baby. Think about your body, its clever design, its not going to be working effectively if you are surrounded by tigers. I’m not talking about, just in the heat of the moment here, just in the act itself, it’s the build up, the anticipation of, because chances are that you already know when you need to be having sex next, if your period comes, right there or shortly afterwards you may be planning when to have sex, and if you have irregular periods, this adds a whole new tiger. Something that I was chatting about with someone recently was that they were advised by a doctor to have sex every other day all the way through their cycle, I was horrified, at this absolute lack of understanding, and this lead to increased stress, discomfort and an impact physically and emotionally not only on her but it impacted the relationship hugely. The pressure is immense, on both sides and this can start to cause issues at a deeper level. There is a pressure to perform, a sense of having to, and this can be on both sides, which is far removed from why you want to have a baby together, so this is a huge area and something that is missed. A client of mine told me how she had turned down a night out with friends, because that was a night she had to have sex, it was in the diary . How does it work for you in your relationship if the night, the scheduled night is here and your partner gets home late? How easy is it to have sex at this point? You're angry, they feel got at perhaps? Baby sex becomes very different, it can feel pressured, something that has to be done, planned and the sense of desire, lust and deep love that was there can be lost. If you are trying for a second chaild, chances are that the sex after having a child is different, you are exhausted, timings are not that easy, things have often become more scheduled anyway perhaps and then you try for another child. So even at the very start, thigs may feel quite pressure. I have a client recently tell me that her and her partner had had amazing sex, pre children sex in fact. So, just to summarise, I don’t focus on sex specifically with my clients, or be a relationship therapist, or give you advice on what to do, but as a part of the programme, when we are addressing other aspects, balancing hormones, shifting our focus and taming your tigers moving into a sense of trust, belief and to a more instinctive state, and ultimately feeling less pressured, a by product is an increased desire and improved sex and relationship. Now I say by product, but of course this is the very thing required, its so much more than putting an egg and sperm together, so very much more.. and you can see that by travelling up stream, we are addressing the cause. If you want to know more, discuss any aspect of this, you can get in touch via the website Instagram and facebook, or , if you want access to me in a supportive, safe group, then the facebook group your fertility matters is still accepting requests and will be opening its doors soon..
