A recent holiday movie began with the question, “Do people really change? Like real lasting positive change? I hope so, because we are in the business of change.” In classic holiday theme, an angelic character seeks to change a Scrooge for good. But the twist occurs when we see that the only way for the angel to change scrooge is if the angel also changes themself. And as the story progresses we see that this internal change on the Angel’s behalf is ultimately the only thing that touches the heart of our Scrooge. Inner change, we see, is the only path to lasting change. 

As New Years approaches, we are all in the midst of making a resolution or two, hoping to change this or that aspect of ourselves or our lives. Studies show, though, that only 9-12% of people keep their New Years Resolutions. At first this might seem depressing, but I actually find it amazing—  1 out of every 10 people change an aspect of themselves for good? Wow, that’s amazing! Because Yogi’s are in the business of change, it’s at the very root of all we do in our practice— growth is change. Essentially we Practice in order to change our small self into our Highest Self, the Inner Self. And for anyone who has put time into their daily practice, they know that change takes a lot of work. It’s sort of like in baseball where if someone strikes out 6 out of every 10 at bats, they are actually considered an MVP, hitting 400 percent of the time. Change is difficult, change is powerful, and change is what we are here to do.  

Even the simplest step of spiritual growth changes our lives dramatically— sitting 1-2 times per day isn’t a matter of adding another item to your calendar, it’s about changing your entire calendar— ie. to get up earlier you have to go to bed earlier, to have a productive evening sit you have to adjust your evening activities, and so on. And when you finally do arrive on the cushion, we see that even the simplest level of change— that of redirecting our awareness from a pesky thought to a sacred mantra—requires a deep internal and sustained effort. Every aspect of our practice requires that we interact directly with change. And for that reason, yogis tend to view change with reverence and awe. 

The Guru Gita gives us a glimpse of the yogic perspective of change— change is nothing short of a transformation, like that of a caterpillar transforming into a butterfly, or a larva into a bee. The Guru Gita writes, “Just as a larva transforms into a bee, similarly, through meditation, one is transformed into that state in which one may abide anywhere.” (118) Change takes place at an atomic level, when we grow everything grows, it’s an experience that goes beyond the mind and senses. This is why the Vijnana Bhairava takes so much time to teach us that change can’t come from the mind, because what we are changing into is “beyond the limitation of space, time, and formation. It has no space, It has no time, It has no form–It is beyond that, beyond these three…this state is, in fact, indescribable, It can’t be described.” 

The mind can describe and anticipate change, but the mind itself cannot comprehend the growth and transformation associated with change. The Vijnana Bhairava teaches “That state [Our True Nature] is not the object of vikalpas, It can’t be perceived by vikalpas (thoughts). You can’t perceive It through the mind…[Bhairavī] has gone above [becoming] the object of thoughts.” Thoughts, vikalpas, are inherently limited— they know reality by breaking up reality into parts, but all these parts are not equal to the whole, ie. We can’t know the experience of the whole from its disparate parts. Try driving a car by putting all the parts in a room, or eating a pie separated into its ingredients on a counter— the parts do not equal the whole, there is a chemical change that must take place. As Jai Deva Singh comments in his exposition notes, “It is when we cling to the part that we miss the whole, that is [the moment] when we stumble” (Note 3).  Or as Patanjali teaches in his Yoga Sutras, “Through self-enquiry the practitioner gains insight, but eventually all mental logic must come to an end in bliss. Following that is the comprehension that all is the Self (yoga).” (1.17) The mind can point us towards change, but change and growth themself are something beyond the mind. 

So the question is then asked of Shiva, how can we change if it’s impossible to know what and how to change? How does a larva know how to change into a bee or butterfly? Shiva responds that if we calm our mind, then our true nature, Bhairava, will rise effortlessly to the surface. Just like when the surface of the ocean becomes calm, and you suddenly see the fish and coral beneath the surface. Or, Shiva continues, you can focus on releasing the attachments of your ego, the likes and dislikes we cling to with every waking breath from dawn to dusk. This will also lead us to lasting transformation. The more the caterpillar gets out of the way, the easier its natural transformation becomes.

And then Shiva concludes that the experience of transformation, the experience of change, is specifically a direct experience, a ‘state of being’. As the text writes it, “That state of Bhairava, [the state of being] which is full of the bliss of non-difference from the entire universe, [that state] is alone Bhairavi, of Shakti of Bhairava.” (JDS translation, emphasis added in brackets). Swami Lakshmanjoo takes extra time in his commentary to emphasize the value of this teaching. “In other words…you can’t find out [what is the real state of Bhairava] because the real state of Bhairava is, in fact, the real state of the knower. It can’t be found [because] It is the [finder]. The real state of Bhairava is the perceiver, It is not perceived. You can’t perceive that state…when there is a desire in you to perceive It. You can perceive It [only] when It comes down in the state of Bhairavī.” We will never be able to change from the outside in, we have to ‘become the change we wish to see in the world’ as Gandhi put it. This is the state of being we seek in meditation— a state that goes beyond technique and into direct experience. As JDS comments, “This is Shambhava Yoga: Though the highest state of Bhairava cannot be described, it can be experienced.” (P.16, exposition, note 2)

So this New Years let yourself consider this slightly more subtle approach to change and transformation. Instead of getting too wrapped up in a list of external items you wish to change, let yourself use that same time and energy to feel inwardly and participate directly with the spirit of transformation itself. When you breath reaches your heart your halfway there, the other half is beginning to make room for the metamorphosis to unfurl.